


A Turn of the Hourglass

by thevillainofthisstory



Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: Angst, Happy Ending, Humor, M/M, Not Phantom Planet Compliant (Danny Phantom), Romance, Time Travel, Vlad POV, alcohol mention, heavily references ultimate enemy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:01:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 22,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26032312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thevillainofthisstory/pseuds/thevillainofthisstory
Summary: Vlad is approached by an infuriatingly charming man who claims to only want to get to know Vlad better. Against his better judgement, Vlad is intrigued. Things are going well, until Danny's intervention ruins everything in more ways than one.
Relationships: Danny Fenton/Vlad Masters
Comments: 42
Kudos: 206
Collections: Pompous Pep Discord - Our Fanfics





	1. Late Summer

**Author's Note:**

> UP FROM THE ASHES I RISE!!! This is not the update that anyone was hoping for, but I have been working sporadically on this fic for over three years. I am very proud of it. My other works have not been abandoned, I promise!
> 
> If there is anything in this fic you feel should have been tagged but wasn't, please let me know! I didn't want to spoil anything by over tagging.

The urge to seek out a third glass of champagne was nearly overwhelming, to the point that Vlad was surprised at himself. He had very strict, self-imposed rules about such things; openings and gala events were limited to two glasses of wine or champagne, or a single glass of liquor for sipping. These rules were made even more pressing when he was donating large sums of money. Vlad had learned that lesson years ago: alcohol and his check book were bosom buddies who had to be kept separate at all costs.

“Mayor Masters,” the scruffy young man in whom Vlad had been attempting to invest some sort of interest pulled his wandering mind away from the concession table. “It’s like this, man. You big, important government people just don’t get it. We’re the heart and soul of Amity Park, yeah? And that’s why I made my sculpture, _RetroRainbowSadTimes._ Because times are scary and you guys aren’t doing anything and it’s not like we the people can do anything because even acknowledging the establishment gives it power over us, ya dig?”

Vlad glanced once more at the concrete rainbow statue that dominated the center of the gallery. Not for the first time that evening, Vlad regretted his contribution to the establishment that housed such an artistic farce. Some might have called his donation extravagant. Others, certain dark haired teenage heroes for example, would think it part of some dastardly clever plot. In truth, Vlad had felt (at the time) that donating the remainder of the funds required by the Amity Arts Council to be an excellent idea. The mayor considered himself a true patron of the arts and when the council approached him with their tale of woe he acted with little thought. Of course he would fund them. Vlad was in need of some public mayoral do-gooding anyway. He probably should have asked to see the art first. They obviously had vastly different ideas on what the word ‘art’ meant.

“So your motivation behind this piece-”

“Nah man, don’t try to find my reasons,” the youth interrupted. Vlad remained perfectly placid, cool smile never faltering. He would simply haunt this hack later; the lad was too far beneath him for Vlad to lose his composure. “You just don’t get it. You gotta think about how it makes you feel.”

Vlad nodded. “Perhaps you are right,” he replied lightly. It made him feel like he had _wasted_ several thousand dollars. “If you’ll excuse me.”

Fate was not on his side that night. Vlad was not able to get more than three steps away from the ungrateful cretin (and towards the refreshments) before the head of the Arts Council cut him off. “Mayor Masters!” she cooed. “Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Really my dear, you have outdone yourself,” he lied, dancing around her question. The only thing that could possibly make the event more enjoyable would be a sudden haunting. Unfortunately, he had paid for a quiet evening and Skulker took his paycheck seriously. “I’m so glad that you were able to save this space. Truly, it is one of the last vestiges of free expression in our little town.”

“You have been too kind. The donation, the refreshments, the studio space… None of this would have been possible without your kind intervention. I wish that you had let us name a wing after you,” she pouted playfully. Vlad was immensely glad this his name would not be associated in any way with the gallery. One of the few times his false modesty had unexpectedly paid off.

“My dear, this was your doing entirely,” Vlad assured her. With a little more glad-handing, Vlad managed to break away and wandered once more around the gallery. Nearly two hours of his time was more than generous as appearances went. He was the mayor, after all. Their kind, benevolent leader who split his time between charity and long hours at the office. Vlad would make one more round of the room, offer some more vague appeasements to the talentless wretches parading around as tortured artists, and then he would be free to head back to his lab. The samples should be ready by the time he returned. A few hours pouring over the results from last week’s tests in comparison with the newest batch would hopefully ease the tension headache he felt climbing up the back of his neck. The herculean effort he had to put into the life of Vlad Masters so that Vlad Plasmius could pursue his goals was so unfair at times. All he wanted was the freedom and power to get what he deserved. He honestly didn’t know why that had to be so difficult.

Vlad’s gaze was pulled once more to the idiotic sculpture that dominated the room. It really was hideous. A sad little concrete bridge painted in varying shades of brown, with a mirror underneath. Vlad stepped up to the sculpture, pretending to give it the reverence that it supposedly deserved as the centerpiece of the collection. Idiotic. He could have been home an hour ago. Another night of research wasted. Vlad sighed, staring into the reflection on the floor. A movement from across the mirror caught his eye as another ‘patron’ stepped up to the sculpture directly across from Vlad.

It was a man, younger than Vlad though perhaps not by much. Vlad watched as the man smirked at the statue and made some comment to the woman next to him. Apparently, the man’s opinion was less than polite, as the woman let out an indignant grunt and stormed off. The man chuckled and ignored her as he continued to stare at the statue. Vlad continued to stare at the man. He wore his grey suit tailored in at the waist which combined with his delightfully broad shoulders to give the man a shoulder to waist ratio of a Hollywood heart throb. Dark blue shirt, black tie, black shoes. No watch, no ring, slight bump in his coat indicating a cell phone, Vlad noted absently. Amity Park was a small town but not so small that the mayor knew everyone by name. Still, Vlad thought he would have remembered this man. He had a familiar air about him, something in the casual way he stood, ignoring everything around him as he stared at-

Vlad. He was staring at Vlad while Vlad ogled him in the mirror. Glancing up, Vlad locked gazes with a pair of pale blue eyes. They lingered for a moment, then looked him up and down. There was nothing overly salacious in the action. Twenty years spent delving deep into the Ghost Zone had taught Vlad what it felt like to be sized up by another predator. Slowly, the man grinned. Normally, Vlad would have brushed off the interaction. The human had no way of knowing what he was dealing with, after all. But Vlad was intrigued and since there was nothing else worth holding his attention, he casually made his way around the monstrous sculpture.

“Admiring the art?” the man drawled as Vlad approached. He had a deep, dark voice that despite its softness commanded all of Vlad’s attention.

“Hmm,” he hummed noncommittally, looking down at his watch. Just because he had been _caught_ staring didn’t mean he had to _admit_ he had been staring. “I would have been, but there was a face in the reflection blocking my view.”

“I _am_ the view,” the man chuckled as he took a sip from his champagne flute. Vlad continued to fuss with his watch. The man had confidence and the physique to match his claim.

“Come on,” he cajoled, mistaking Vlad’s silence for lack of interest, “I’m much more interesting than pondering how the sepia tones of _RetroRainbowSadTimes_ make you feel.”

“I see you spoke to the artist as well.”

“I spoke to its _creator_ , yes,” the man corrected. That was a point in his favor. “When I asked him how he had reinforced the concrete he told me that it was held together with by the hopes of the oppressed. I think that means he used chicken wire, but I’m still not entirely certain.”

“I was told that my position in office precluded me from true understanding,” Vlad said dryly.

The man paused mid sip, pulling the glass of champagne away from his mouth. “Position in office?” he queried, brows furrowing. “Don’t tell me you’re a politician. You’re not the right kind of sleazy, square-jawed handsome. And you certainly don’t look like you’d be caught sleeping with someone’s wife.”

“I happen to be the mayor of this fine city,” Vlad informed him neutrally, ignoring the jab. That was why Vlad didn’t recognize him; the man was not a native son of the ghost blighted town he had stolen.

“So this is all your fault,” the man asserted as he returned his attention to his champagne.

“I beg your pardon?” Vlad sputtered. Impudence was intolerable no matter how attractive the packaging was.

The man had the gall to laugh in his face. “You heard me,” he chuckled. “Or was this morning’s headline a lie? ‘Mayor Masters: Sole Savior of Amity Arts’?”

Vlad cringed. That particular headline hadn’t been his idea. In an extraordinarily stupid bout of honesty and a desire for positive media representation, Vlad had allowed the paper to name the article whatever they chose without reviewing it first. “Ah yes,” he agreed blandly, “That delightful work of fiction.”

“Fiction?” the man countered quickly. “So you support yellow journalism and sensationalism in this delightful backwater? You should be ashamed.”

“How dare you insinuate-” Vlad hissed, but the man’s lopsided grin stopped him. Was he being teased? Mocked? Tricked? Unwittingly pumped for information? Vlad couldn’t tell. It was unusual for Vlad to lose control of a conversation although, he admitted, losing his temper was becoming an increasingly common occurrence. The man obviously knew that and was trying to throw Vlad off kilter. “Who are you and what do you want?”

“Very direct. I like that in a man. Sometimes, anyway,” the man mused as he drained the remainder of his champagne. Without looking away from Vlad, the man reached out and lightly deposited the empty glass on the tray of a passing waiter. “I’m new to town. Just moved in this morning, as a matter of fact. Saw the paper, thought I’d pop in. I’d say I meant no offense, Mayor Master’s, but-well. I rather did. That doesn’t mean that you haven’t been a delightful conversationalist. Best in the room, although with a crowd like this,” he trailed off with a gesture to the room at large. “I hate to cut this short but we can’t all go through life being wealthy and handsome. Some of us still have to work in the morning.”

With another lazy grin, the man turned and walked towards the door without looking back. A certain swagger in his gait told Vlad that the man knew Vlad was watching him. Vlad stared at the door for nearly a minute after the man had left, pondering their interaction. He hadn’t seemed to have wanted anything beyond insulting Vlad and giving him a few backhanded complements. The entire interaction should have been completely off putting and infuriating. Yet for some reason, all Vlad felt was moderately annoyed, oddly flattered, and decidedly off balance. The man had neglected, in what Vlad assumed was a deliberate omission designed to further nettle him, to mention his name.

“Mayor Masters!” the head of the arts council had reappeared, pulling his gaze away from the door (though not, entirely, his attention). “Are you alright? Can you believe the nerve of that man? Coming in here, sassing my artists, belittling their work! To their faces! All the while making snide comments about everything from the art to the building to the parking lot!”

Having been personally acquainted with their mystery guest, Vlad opted to nod sympathetically. “I assure you, I am perfectly fine. How are you, my dear? Not overly taxed, I hope?” he asked saccharinely.

“I’ll be fine,” she promised with an over exaggerated huff. “Unlike that Mr. Geist if I ever see him again, let me tell you!”

“Mr. Geist?”

“That terribly rude man, he signed the guest book as P. T. Geist. I’m having him barred from the premise as a menace to society. Waltzing in, talking down to everyone, thinking that his looks give him a pass to do as he pleases!”

Vlad nodded along absently. He had a name to go with that charming face and abrasive personality. If P. T. Geist thought he had seen the last of Vlad Masters then he was sorely mistaken.

* * *

In his limited free time over the next several days, Vlad began searching for information on Mr. Geist. Most of what he found was completely mundane. Geist was a graduate of Maryland State University’s history program. While working nights in a twenty-four-hour diner, Geist apparently penned a horrifyingly dire romance novel about a vampire falling in love with a mermaid. In what Vlad could only surmise to be a joke taken too far, the novel was published. The book sold out, along with all of Geist’s professional credibility. Rather than admit to shameful defeat, Geist bounced back with a series of books focused on local myths, legends, monsters, and to Vlad’s great humor, _hauntings_. They were not fictional drivel; Geist interviewed witnesses and shed light on the origins of some of the most intriguing cases of the supernatural in the country. At least, that is what the dust cover of his latest work proclaimed.

Despite all the information on his professional career, there was little to nothing on the man himself. He refused to attend book signing events although with a prima opus like Geist’s Vlad could not blame him. Everyone whom he had ever interviewed christened him an intent listener and witty conversationalist. Vlad could find precious little else beyond his tax records, birth certificate, and previous addresses. He even had a perfect driving record.

The most important thing Vlad uncovered was his current address. Geist was indeed new to Amity Park. He resided in Amity Heights, one of the nicer apartment complexes in the city.

Now that he had the information, Vlad was uncertain what he wished to do with it. It was not as though he could simply fly over, bang on the door, and demand an explanation for the man’s off putting yet intriguing behavior. That was the crux of the issue. Vlad was _intrigued_. Hadn’t Vlad been wishing for something interesting? And Geist just happened to show up, looking like he did and acting as though Vlad should find his impertinence endearing. There were precious few who could capture and hold Vlad’s attention so wholly and Geist had managed it in a single conversation.

It could all be a trap, of course. Geist was literally a ghost writer; he could know something about Vlad’s secret. On a less dramatic note, Vlad was the mayor of the most haunted town in the country. Wanting an interview would just be good business for the man. There were too many variables. Without another conversation Vlad would never know what his newest citizen wanted. That was the whole of it; Vlad needed to know what Geist wanted. It had nothing to do with how delicious the man had looked in his grey suit and even less to do with the clearly appreciative glances he kept sending Vlad’s way. Vlad refused to even contemplate the implications of such actions and his nonexistent reactions to them.


	2. Early Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's football season for Casper High, and Vlad is looking forward to the first game of the year. He might even run into the mysterious Mr Geist. Or, given Vlad's usual luck, Danny will show up and ruin everything in spectacular fashion.

The next time Vlad encountered Mr. Geist was nowhere near as pleasant as the first. In fact, if he were a man prone to over exaggeration, he might even hazard to call it an unmitigated disaster.

Fall football season had begun and Vlad had been invited to give an opening speech at the first Casper High game of the season. The bleachers were filled, the band poised and ready to go, everything was as it was meant to be. Vlad adored everything about football season. It was a simple pleasure in between his plans for domination.

“Good evening Casper High Crows!” Vlad boomed from the commentator’s box. The dull sound of cheering barely penetrated the cinder-block room, but Vlad could see that the entire town was assembled in the bleachers. “This is Mayor Masters here with your favorite English teacher, Mr. Lancer-”

“There will be no hanky-panky under the bleachers this year! I will not have a repeat of the Great Panty Processional of ’76!”

“Yes, thank you Mr. Lancer. As I was saying, welcome to the inaugural game of the season. There’s only one thing I wish to say before turning the mic over to your usual commentator: GO CROWS!”

Vlad passed the mic back to Mr. Lancer. “Truly inspirational, Mayor. How do you do it?” Lancer asked into the microphone. His tone was sincere, but something about the man’s eyebrows hinted at sarcasm. Perhaps sarcastic eyebrows were a skill learned after teaching high school for several centuries.

Rather than answer, Vlad clapped the other man on the shoulder and headed towards the door. His part of the proceedings was finished and now he was at leisure to do as he pleased. An invisible, aerial view of the game sounded delightful. And then when he returned home, Vlad could finish reading Maddie’s latest paper on ectobiology. For a woman who had never actually taken scalpel to spook, she had some remarkably accurate ideas about their physiology.

As Vlad was reaching for the door handle it was flung wide open, smarting his hand something fierce. “Oh, butter biscuit,” he hissed before suddenly being tackled to the ground. “What in the name of- Daniel! What do you think you’re doing?”

“Vlad?” the teen squawked from his ungainly position across Vlad’s stomach. “But if you’re in here, then who’s been-”

“Yes, I’ve been in here you twit, it’s the first game of the season where else would I be?” he groused as he shoved the younger halfa off him. Daniel rolled over onto his back with a groan. Vlad struggled to his feet, brushing off his coat and pants. Glaring down disdainfully at his ‘mortal enemy’ Vlad once again demanded, “What exactly is the problem, Daniel?”

“Yes, Mr. Fenton, where’s the fire?” Mr. Lancer interrupted. Vlad watched with twisted satisfaction as Danny visibly panicked.

“Mr. Lancer I was-”

“Not being where you’re supposed to be? Again, Mr. Fenton?” Lancer interjected sourly. “I don’t know why I bother asking anymore. But if you’re in here then who, pray tell, is out on the field wearing that mascot uniform?”

“Well you see I was-”

“Fobbing your responsibilities off on Mr. Foley or Ms. Manson, I assume. Get out, Mr. Fenton. If by the end of the game you’re not the one wearing that crow suit, you’ll be eating crow. Do I make myself clear?”

“You don’t mean that literally, right?” Danny cringed.

“That would be up to Mr. Baxter, I believe.”

“I’ll make sure he gets where he needs to be,” Vlad assured as he grabbed Danny by the shoulders and wheeled him out of the commentator’s box. Danny shrugged him off with a mulish glare as they descended the steps side by side.

“Tell me you have nothing to do with this,” Danny hissed out of the corner of his mouth. He stared resolutely ahead, presumably so he wouldn’t lose his footing in the dark. Perhaps Danny’s night vision wasn’t as developed as Vlad’s was. More likely, he hadn’t thought to utilize it.

“I have nothing to do with this,” Vlad declared blandly. “Does that make you feel better?”

“Not really,” Danny sighed. As they reached the bottom, Danny turned to look Vlad directly in the eyes. A bold choice considering he could shoot ectolasers out of them. “But you’re you, right fruitloop? Like, one hundred percent crazed, soggy fruitloop?”

“Little badger, I have neither the time nor the patience to stand here while you ask half formed questions and hurl insults like a-”

“Alright, shut up, I believe it’s you,” Danny snapped. “There’s some shapeshifter thing flying around the school. At first, I thought it was just a ghost possessing people but if you’ve been up there with Lancer the whole time then I guess that means shapeshifter. Great.”

“I would be a remarkably difficult target to possess, Daniel,” Vlad pointed out, flicking his eyes from blue to red and then back.

“You’re remarkably difficult alright,” Danny griped with a green glare. Vlad put his hands up in mock surrender. He wasn’t looking for a fight at the moment. Besides, Danny seemed busy and Vlad was selfish enough to want all of his attention for himself. If he was going to go to all the effort of a diabolical plan aimed to ruin the younger halfa’s life, then Vlad at least deserved the courtesy of his undivided attention. “Just go watch the stupid game. And watch out for my dad, he’s wearing his ‘V-Man’ outfit again.”

Vlad cringed. “I’ll be around,” he hinted vaguely. Ghost or not, Vlad fully intended to watch the rest of the game.

“That’s not comforting.”

“It wasn’t meant to be,” Vlad said with a mean little smile. “Besides, how could I live with myself if I missed your end performance? Who will come out of the mascot costume? Will our hero save the day in time?”

“Of course you’d want to see me stripped down to my boxers and force fed an entire fursuit in the middle of a football field,” Danny sighed. Vlad raised a skeptical eyebrow at the boy’s overly dramatic assessment. “Now if you’ll excuse me, some of us have actual work to do.”

And with that, Danny raced off into the night.

Vlad made his way back around the bleachers at a more sedate pace. If Danny wanted to race around doing exhausting hero work and turning Vlad down at every opportunity then fine, that was his prerogative. Despite being intrigued by the concept of a shapeshifter- which would be a delightful test subject to dissect- Vlad had no interest in helping that ungrateful whelp. Perhaps once Daniel had released it into the ghost zone Vlad could track it down and-

“Hey!” a deep voice barked but it was too late. Vlad collided face first with a firm chest. As he stumbled backwards from the impact, a pair of strong hands grasped his upper arms. “Mayor Masters. To what to I owe this unexpected pleasure?”

“Mr. Geist,” Vlad greeted stiffly. This had not been the plan. Vlad had intended to dither for a while longer, to ponder what to do about the curious case of Mr. Geist. He certainly hadn’t intended to literally run into the man at a public function. “If you would please-”

“Stop manhandling you?” Geist guessed with what Vlad was quickly realizing to be a nearly permanent expression of sarcastic amusement. “You were the one who ran into me. I could have let you fall on your ass.”

“Yet by the goodness of your heart you decided to save me, really I’m flattered,” Vlad blustered. Geist was too close, too attractive, and too unknown for Vlad to lose control of the situation again. “Now let me go.”

Amazingly, Geist did as he was asked. Without another comment Geist released his grip on Vlad’s upper arms, took a step back, and proceeded to raise his hands in a placating gesture. “No offense meant this time, Mayor. Just trying to make a break for it before the throngs of spirited citizens clog up the roads,” Geist drawled.

Vlad considered the other man with narrowed eyes. He wore black slacks and a white shirt with a cobalt blue tie several shades darker than his eyes. His sport coat was slung carelessly under one arm. A bulge in one of the coat pockets indicated a cell phone while a slightly larger one in his pants pocket was surely a wallet. Geist wasn’t dressed for a football game. “It’s not even half time,” Vlad argued genially. “Where could you be running off to so early?”

Geist barked out a laugh. “I’m not a football fan,” he said. Vlad tried not to be personally offended; there were plenty of offensive things about this man’s personality and hating the greatest sport on earth was just another crime on the list. “I was working.”

“Working?” Vlad asked, latching onto the new topic. “And what exactly do you do, Mr. Geist? You failed to mention that at the gallery opening.”

“I also failed to mention my name,” Geist pointed out, “But you seem to have figured that out just fine. I’d wager you know who I am and what I do, Mayor Masters. If you’re going to ask questions at least do me the courtesy of making them interesting.”

“What happened to my being a delightful conversationalist?” Vlad asked airily despite his fraying nerves. He refused to lose his temper again, but it was difficult when Geist demanded that Vlad be straightforward when the other man was being anything but.

Geist had the audacity to laugh at him. “I suppose you are when you’re not trying to pump me for information,” Geist acquiesced. “Stop me if I get something wrong. You got my name off the sign in book at the gallery and undoubtedly did a little research even if it was just plugging my name into a search engine. The reason you even bothered in the first place is because you think I want something from you. I suppose I do but I can guarantee it’s not anything you’ve thought of in that delightfully paranoid silver head. You’re not an idiot, Mayor Masters, and neither am I. If you have an actual question, please feel free to ask.”

Vlad glared at the man and considered his options for a moment. All he wanted was to know why Geist had approached him and what the man wanted. Could it really be so easy as just asking? It seemed too easy to just ask for something from a man like Geist. Vlad had never trusted anything that was too easy.

Vlad took a moment more to quiet his thoughts and steel himself before asking, “Why did you approach me at the gallery?”

“I’m sorry, I thought I had made myself clear. You’re very attractive and I wanted to talk to you,” Geist replied bluntly.

Vlad let out an uncomfortable cough. And then another. That couldn’t be right. Geist must have been trying to distract him and take control of the situation with his bizarre words and strange ideas about flattery. Unfortunately for Vlad, Geist’s methods were all too effective.

A predatory grin slowly uncurled from Geist’s amused face, instantly transforming him from bored and sarcastic to something much closer to sin. “Have I made you uncomfortable, Mayor?” he asked smoothly, taking a step closer so he was once more in Vlad’s personal space. Vlad held his ground through a mix of stubbornness and shameful interest. “How can that be possible? A man in your position with your look should be used to compliments. I didn’t even bother to get poetic and yet you’re blushing like I’ve said something vulgar.”

“Perhaps I think you’re lying,” Vlad countered while trying to ignore the faint pink flush that was traveling up from under his suit coat. He was a grown man, a powerful political figure, and at least half dead; Vlad Masters had no reason to be blushing.

“Lying about just wanting to talk? Or about finding you attractive?” Geist asked. “Both are the honest truth. There I was, bored out of my mind and contemplating the virtues of another glass of champagne when I just happened to see a vision staring at me from across the room. You came over to me, if you’ll recall. All I wanted was a bit of friendly conversation with a handsome gentleman. You were the one who had to go and get all paranoid. Not many can pull off being both adorably paranoid yet undeniably fetching. You should feel proud.”

“I feel as though you need a bit more practice understanding how compliments are intended to work,” Vlad retorted. Inside he was reeling. It was a trick. Geist couldn’t be genuinely interested. No one was ever interested in Vlad, only in the things he could do for them. That was the way he preferred things. Vlad had spent a great deal of time and effort on becoming marketable to a variety of interested parties. His wealth, power, and abilities had achieved everything he could possibly want in life. Geist was simply being unrealistic.

Peering down into Vlad’s eyes, Geist suddenly became serious. “You don’t believe that I find you attractive,” he declared incredulously. “That’s your major hang up? That’s why you’re being so obstinate?”

“And what, exactly, am I being obstinate about?” Vlad demanded. “Of the two of us, you have been the instigator of all manner of insults and false compliments. You have been impertinent at every opportunity when all I have wanted is a reason for your presence. So please, explain to me how and why I am being obstinate.”

“We have had exactly one previous conversation. Why are you so invested in me, Mayor? I’m sure you get insulted and flattered all the time. But for some reason you’ve decided that I’m worth unraveling. Excellent choice by the way, I’m quite the catch,” Geist interrupted himself to gesture at his very impressive physique. “But instead of examining your own motives you’ve just arbitrarily decided that I’m up to no good. Maybe it’s time to think about your intentions, not mine. So. What do you want, Mayor? Because as much fun as a little mutual stalking can be, I have a few better ideas.”

“I don’t even know you,” Vlad muttered. Geist had managed to sweep the conversation out from under him yet again and this time he had included a few truths. It all struck Vlad a little too close to home. The man couldn’t honestly expect him to want to pursue something from nothing? Vlad had built an empire on lies, he was a master of them. Geist was a little too smooth and a little too pretty to have an honest interest in Vlad.

“So?” Geist asked. “That’s half the fun of-”

A huge crash interrupted whatever Geist was about to say. Out on the field, Danny Phantom was riding on the back of what appeared to be some sort of chimera. The crowd in the bleachers seemed frozen, watching in horror as the ghost boy careened towards them. “RUN!” Danny yelled, his voice cracking. The crowd didn’t need to be told twice; with a terrified roar, the townsfolk streamed down from the bleachers heading directly towards Vlad and Mr. Geist.

Geist heaved out a sigh. “Another time, Mayor,” he drawled, sounding more put upon than terrified. As the mob descended upon them, Geist seemed to melt into the throng right before Vlad’s eyes.

Allowing himself to be swept along in the tide of panicking civilians, Vlad fumed silently. Leave it to Daniel to wreck everything. Of course he was too inexperienced to handle a simple shapeshifter. Why did Vlad ever assume otherwise? Daniel’s incompetence was legendary. The opening game had been ruined and Vlad’s very interesting conversation with Mr. Geist had been cut short just when they were starting to make progress.

As he came around the corner of the high school Vlad ducked out of the crowd. Taking a moment to ensure that there was no one around to catch him, Vlad tugged at the spectral energy that always lurked at his core, willing the transformation from man to monster. He would clean up Daniel’s mess, and then Daniel would pay dearly for his unintentional disruption.

It didn’t take long to find Daniel and the beast. They were still ravaging the football field, deadlocked as Daniel tried in vain to corral the monster by riding it. Amateur. Vlad soared purposefully over and without any effort electrocuted the chimera. The best wailed and bucked Daniel off in agony. Ignoring Daniel’s fumbling attempts to right himself in the air, Vlad shocked the beast again. All thoughts of studying the creature had been abandoned. The uncertainty about Geist, the utter shamble that the opening game had devolved into, Daniel’s continued blithe disregard, it was too much. Vlad had officially lost his temper.

Recovering from being stunned, the chimera wheeled around to face Vlad. As the beast reared back to crush him with an enormous lion’s paw, Vlad formed a spherical shield around himself. The blow glanced off his defenses harmlessly. Thrashing its tail, the beast let out a frustrated roar. Vlad stared it down with a nasty smile. Yes, he knew the feeling.

“Here kitty, kitty!” Daniel called, interrupting Vlad’s fun as usual. “You don’t know where that’s been.” The beast roared again before bounding across the field towards the younger ghost. “I’m sure I’m the better catch anyway; less bitter.”

Being a dumb animal, the chimera failed to notice Danny’s arm hidden behind his back until it was too late. Fenton Thermos in hand, Danny neatly trapped the chimera in a blaze of blue-white light. “And the cat’s in the bag,” Danny declared proudly as he capped the thermos closed. Floating over to where Vlad was hovering, Danny shook the now occupied thermos in his direction. “What’s with the assist, Vlad? You didn’t seem interested earlier and now you’re actually being helpful?”

“Oh Daniel,” he drawled, floating a little bit closer. Daniel was either too tired to too stupid to back up. “This has nothing to do with your little shapeshifter.” Quick as lightning, Vlad grabbed Danny by the throat. Tightening his grip as the boy struggled to pry his fingers off, Vlad continued harshly, “This is about you and your pathetic incompetence managing to once again RUIN EVERYTHING.”

“What are you talking ab-” Danny tried to ask but Vlad silenced him with a blast of electricity. The boy writhed in pain, scrabbling to break free of Vlad’s iron grip. His screams were a balm to Vlad’s frazzled nerves.

“Do you ever think of anyone but yourself, Daniel? How your supposedly heroic actions impact the people around you?” Vlad hissed, sending another jolt through the other halfa.

“That’s rich coming from you, you self-centered fruitloop,” Danny panted, glaring at Vlad with pained eyes. “I know you like football, but this is crazy even for you.”

“Crazy?” Vlad mused as he descended back to the razed field below them. “Hmm. I see your point, but have you considered-?” Yet another electrocution had Danny fighting to keep his eyes open. Were he feeling more generous, Vlad might have been impressed that the younger halfa hadn’t reverted back to his human form. In his current mood, however, Vlad wanted the boy to _bleed_.

“You make a good argument,” Danny wheezed, head lolling to one side as smoke drifted from scorched patches of his body. “Here’s my counter point.” Ice leapt from the ground, rapidly encasing every part of Vlad. Danny broke free of his grasp just in time for the ice to reach Vlad’s hand. “I think you need to chill out.”

Temper flaring, Vlad reached inside for the fire that burned at his core. With as angry as he was, Vlad was surprised at how long it took him to burn off his icy shell. Perhaps Daniel was getting stronger after all. Scanning the sky, Vlad caught sight of Danny’s retreating form in the distant skyline. “Sorry to cut things short Vlad, but we’ll have to save this for another time!” Daniel called back as he fled.

Vlad stood alone on the empty, ravaged field stared at the destruction around him. It was just another day in the pathetic existence of Vlad Masters.


	3. Late Fall and Winter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vlad attempts some introspection and personal growth for the first time in his life and ends up with a date because of it. Not even Vlad's paranoia is enough to deter Mr Geist's pursuit of a relationship with the mayor.

In the weeks that followed that fateful football game, Vlad had time to think about all manner of things in his life. Geist was right, although he had no way of knowing just how on point his advice had been; Vlad needed to seriously assess several key areas of his life. It wasn’t as though his personal and secret lives were suddenly spiraling out of control, but Vlad sometimes felt as though that was the case. He lived alone with nothing but his triple life to keep him company. Mayor Masters, Vlad Masters, and Vlad Plasmius were all very demanding men. His Mayor persona was the easiest to maintain; there was little to ponder on that front beyond his new proposition for bridge repairs that was due next Wednesday.

Vlad Plasmius was rather stagnant at the moment. There was nothing in the ghost zone that required his immediate attention. Beyond his continuing experimentation on the origin of his own existence, Vlad had little to occupy his ghostly time. After his last encounter with Daniel (which he refused to take the blame for) Plasmius had been quiet. It had nothing to do with being out maneuvered by a plucky teenager with a hero complex; Danny’s very existence was beginning to give Vlad a headache. The only creature on the planet who knew Vlad, truly knew him in all his forms, had repeatedly and thoroughly rejected him. Because of something as arbitrary as ‘good versus evil.’ How utterly naïve. They could have been-

And that was the crux of Vlad’s issue. He had to stop chasing everything that ‘could have been.’ His interest in Maddie had waned after the discovery of Danny. As much as he adored the woman, Daniel had the potential to be his equal in all respects. But then Danny, like his mother before him, had rejected Vlad. It was time to move on from them. They didn’t deserve what Vlad had to offer.

This brought him to the topic he had been avoiding. The marvelous Mr. Geist, with his blunt intentions and sarcastic wit. What did Vlad want from him? For a man so accustomed to wanting things for definite reasons, Vlad was hesitant to examine his motives behind his interest in Geist. The man was undeniably attractive. Vlad was not a short man, but Geist towered over him. With stature like that, he could have attempted to physically intimidate Vlad, but he had yet to try. Geist almost seemed to not notice his height in relation to his surroundings. And with shoulders **_that_** broad Vlad wanted to climb him like a-

“Enough,” Vlad sighed, breaking out of his reverie. Glancing at the clock above the mantel, Vlad realized he had been sitting in the same hopeless position for over an hour. The fire had begun to die in the grate. Standing and stretching, Vlad went to put another log on the fireplace. There was still more thinking to do.

After tending to the fire, Vlad headed towards his liquor cabinet. The ice had melted in his whisky, leaving it just a tad too watered down. Topping it off quickly, Vlad downed it in a few swallows then filled his glass again. He didn’t know why he was doing this to himself, allowing some man he had spoken to twice to get him so twisted up inside.

Admitting Geist was attractive was easy. Admitting he, personally, was attracted to the man? Impossible. Acknowledging that he was charmed by the man’s insulting conversations? Preposterous. Vlad had no room in his life for sarcastic authors who invaded his personal space and declared him attractive, no matter how much of a connection he might feel towards the scoundrel.

Vlad paused, his glass raised halfway to his lips. “Now why would I feel a connection to a man I’ve never met,” he muttered. He was lonely, yes, but was he so lonely that random men in art galleries were suddenly an appealing option? Or could it be Geist specifically?

Vlad had pursued more for less. He tolerated Daniel’s existence merely due to the fact they had both been permanently damaged by Jack Fenton’s idiocy. After all, he had become mayor of Amity Park for the sole purpose of being closer to Danny, a teenager who despised the very sight of him. Wanting companionship from an interested, handsome man was closer to the realm of normal than Vlad had been in a long time.

It was decided then. Vlad wanted a companion, and he wanted it to be Geist. Now all he had to do was find the man and declare as such. Simple. Terrifyingly, heart stoppingly simple. Or it would be, if he knew how to go about such a conversation. Showing up uninvited at the man’s apartment several weeks after their last conversation just to say that he was tentatively interested in whatever it was that Geist was offering was a pathetically poor plan.

Vlad glanced at the clock once more. It was getting late and he had to be at the office in the morning. Finishing off his glass of whisky one last time, Vlad headed for bed. It was a small town; he would undoubtedly run into Geist again eventually. For the first time in what might have been literal years, Vlad had something positive to look forward to in the morning.

* * *

Three days later, Vlad’s positive outlook paid off. Making his way through city hall, Vlad was practically whistling with glee. His proposed bill for the bridge repairs in town had passed; through careful finessing of the numbers, they were going to be able to come in under budget. It had been a productive morning and Vlad was pleased enough that he was going to treat himself to lunch at the café up the street. And by lunch he meant eating no less than three of their chocolate croissants. Vlad deserved it, he hadn’t maimed anyone in days.

Just as he made it to the door, Vlad realized he had left his phone in his office. Briefly he contemplated just leaving it there, but he couldn’t risk anyone going through it. The last thing he needed was one of the cleaning staff accidentally finding out that the mayor had Skulker on speed dial. Walking briskly, Vlad headed back to his office. On the desk, right where he left it, was his phone. Slipping it into his pocket, Vlad once again headed out.

Back in the main lobby, Vlad had stopped to chat with one of the security guards when out of the corner of his eye he caught sight of something that made his heart trip over itself. Mr. Geist was speaking with one of the clerks, balancing a large stack of papers in one hand and gesturing broadly with the other. Excusing himself from the guard, Vlad made his way over to Mr. Geist. Stopping a few feet short, Vlad listened in on the conversation.

“And you’re certain that those files have what you’re looking for, Mr. Geist?” the clerk asked. He had an unpleasant, nasal voice that had always grated on Vlad’s nerves. “They’re awfully…disjointed.”

Geist raised a skeptical eyebrow. “If I knew which files I needed, we wouldn’t have spent three hours slogging through century old land disputes and contested inheritances, would we Mr. Willis? No, we wouldn’t. I won’t know how useful this is until I can examine it, much like I didn’t know how useful you’d be until we were already an hour into our adventure. A little more cataloguing and a lot less bumbling next time. You’re almost competent, Mr. Willis, it’s not that far of a stretch to becoming a solid c-grade clerk,” Geist explained, shifting the papers from one hand to the other.

“Um thanks, Mr. Geist…I think?” the clerk stuttered. Geist’s backhanded flattery had taken yet another victim. “I’ll be here if you need to come back for anything.”

“That’s hardly an encouragement to return,” Geist sighed before clapping Willis on the arm and walking towards the door where Vlad was hovering.

“Mr. Geist,” Vlad greeted in what he hoped was a neutral tone. Now that the moment had come, Vlad was beginning to have doubts. What if Geist had changed his mind? What if Vlad really was just a pathetic middle-aged man who should invest in a cat?

All of his doubts flew away at the grin Geist bestowed upon him. “Mayor Masters,” he replied brightly. “What an unexpected pleasure. To what do I owe the honor?”

“I was heading out to lunch, actually, and when I saw you here in the lobby I wanted to ask if you’d join me,” Vlad asked. There it was, everything out on the table. Or at least, as much as Vlad was capable of putting forth without going into cardiac arrest. His pulse had skyrocketed.

“Really?” This was the first time Vlad had ever seen Geist anywhere close to surprised. “Just like that? I’m impressed, Mayor. I thought it would take a little more good-natured prodding before you even considered my offer.”

“You have yet to offer anything beyond insults wrapped in pretty words,” Vlad countered, “And if that is your idea of good-natured prodding then I would hate to see what you would consider pestering.”

Somehow Geist’s smile got even broader. “I’m looking forward the look on your face when you find out,” he promised, “I’m guessing it’ll look something like when I tell you I can’t go to lunch with you right now.”

Vlad scowled and ignored the feeling of the floor being opened up underneath him. “And why not?” he demanded.

“I like it when you’re pushy,” Geist teased. With a more serious tone he continued, “I have a business lunch with a descendent of one of the witches I’m researching. It’s important, otherwise I would ditch her for you in a heartbeat. You’re infinitely more pleasant than that old biddy even when you’re not getting your way.”

Vlad surmised that he was becoming inured to Geist’s manner of speaking when he didn’t feel the slightest irritation at yet another backhanded compliment. “You’ve moved to the most haunted town in the country to research witches?” Vlad deadpanned. In truth, that was for the best.

“Quite the serendipitous choice if I say so myself,” Geist said as he shifted the pile of papers from his hand to under his arm. “Come to a haunted town to find a witch and end up meeting a handsome man for coffee. I can live with that.”

“Who said anything about coffee?”

“I did. This afternoon? Five thirty? I’d say dinner but that’s a bit too overdone and I don’t eat much while I’m writing anyway. I do have a sweet tooth and if you’d like we can have coffee and pastries. Maybe talk about why you like football, and my collection of spacecraft models,” Geist offered. He stared at Vlad hopefully, leaving the decision completely up to him. Vlad couldn’t remember the last time someone had cared so much about his opinion of something so trivial.

“Luckily for you, Mr. Geist, I happen to have a sweet tooth as well,” Vlad admitted, pretending to sound put out. “There’s a little café down the street from here that makes the most delightful chocolate croissants. Five thirty.”

“Paul,” he corrected. “It’s Paul to you.”

“How terribly common,” Vlad replied with mock disdain. It was strange a strange thing to be verbally rough with someone and know they wouldn’t be offended about it. Perhaps that was how Paul felt all the time: liberated.

“I can’t be too perfect,” Paul countered with an easy smile. “All of my wit and charm wrapped up in a package like this? I had to have a boring name or people would just swoon as I walked by. More than they already do.”

Vlad shook his head in surrender. “I will be taking my leave of you and your ego now,” Vlad declared as he turned toward the door. “And I expect only one of you to show up for coffee.” Geist’s laughter followed Vlad out the door and for the first time in far too long, Vlad felt good.

* * *

Coffee had been excellent. Lunch a few days later had been even better. Vlad didn’t know what he had done to deserve his sudden run of good fortune, but he certainly wasn’t about to question it. Paul was no less scathing than Vlad had originally found him, but he was also humorous and insightful and had a terrible habit of making Vlad laugh by saying all manner of awful things. During one of their evening walks Paul had decided to turn his humor on a passing duck and made so many terrible puns that Vlad had to sit on a bench from laughing so hard.

In turn, Vlad hoped he provided someone against whom Paul could whet his wit. He could hold his own in arguments that most people would call scathing at best and volatile at worst. Paul liked to argue simply for the entertainment of it, Vlad had noticed and indulged him. Sometimes he would catch Paul staring at him with a faint smile as though Vlad had somehow met all his standards. That’s certainly how Vlad felt about Paul, and Vlad was unaware that he actually **_had_** standards.

They had been meeting every few days for a little over a month. Small outings, mostly, such as lunch or a walk around the park. As unexpectedly smitten as Vlad was, he had no intention of letting this new thing move very quickly. Vlad was still the mayor and his tenure was dependent on the will of the people. The media wouldn’t be kind to his relationship; rather than a partner or companion, Paul (with his gorgeous face and ridiculous build) would be labeled a torrid homosexual love affair. Vlad would lose his position just when he had started to enjoy the job for its own sake. There was also the fact that he was, in practical effect, a ghost possessing his own corpse. It wasn’t that Vlad was dreading that conversation; he had already made up his mind that it would not be happening. He deserved some secrets, after all.

One cold November evening, as Vlad was walking towards his and Paul’s usual meeting spot by the park entrance, his phone began ringing. “Mayor Masters,” he answered without checking the caller id.

“Vlad,” Paul greeted warmly. “Picking up on the first ring. I do love that about you.”

Vlad rolled his eyes. “I’m nearly at the park, you impatient lout,” he groused halfheartedly. “You can wait a few more minutes in the cold. It’ll be worth your while.” In the hand not holding his cell phone, Vlad clutched a bag of pastries from their favorite shop.

“Worth my while?” Paul asked, his deep voice falling to an even deeper register. “I like the sound of that.”

Vlad let out a single bark of laughter. He had, for perfectly valid reasons, barely even kissed the other man yet. Paul was lucky if they even brushed hands ‘accidentally’ while they were walking. Despite the fact that Vlad was slowly dying inside every time he had to watch Paul’s shirt pull taut as he stretched or the delightful bit of skin that was revealed when he pulled off his tie, Vlad held fast. He had to be absolutely sure about Paul for completely logistical reasons; ectoacne and his ghostly lifestyle had left Vlad riddled with scars. Vlad needed to be sure that Paul wouldn’t flee at the sight of them or worse, start asking too many questions. If he could play it off as being ashamed of his skin, Vlad figured he might have a chance at keeping Paul.

“I have scones,” Vlad declared. “Scones, and the joy of my company. What more could you want?”

“How about dinner and not freezing my tight little ass off,” Paul countered. “My publisher called right when I was about to leave, I called you as soon as I got off the phone with her. I’m still at my apartment and not really feeling like trekking out into the frozen wasteland you call a town. Come by my apartment and I’ll cook for you.”

Vlad stopped walking as he pondered his options. On the one hand, he wanted to see Paul. Badly. On the other hand, it was well past the point in a normal relationship where physical indications of affection were expected. “I was unaware that cooking was one of your many talents,” Vlad stalled. Maybe he could convince Paul to go out for dinner.

“I’m not going to ravish you if that’s what you’re worried about,” Paul sighed from the other end of the line. Vlad wondered briefly when he had become so transparent. “Well, not unless you ask me to. Very nicely. I’m sure you could convince me with a little effort. What was I saying?”

“You were failing to convince me that my virtue was safe,” Vlad retorted. It was unfair just how sinful Paul’s voice could sound, especially when he was implying the various unnamed, untoward things he’d like to do to Vlad. This wasn’t the first time the subject had come up.

“I was unaware that you had any virtue left,” Paul chuckled. Vlad resisted the urge to laugh with him. If only the other man knew. “Come on Vlad. Let me cook for you. I have cheap wine and pasta waiting, along with the joy of my company.”

Vlad could have argued more, but he allowed himself to be out maneuvered. “Fine. I can be there in ten minutes,” Vlad admitted grudgingly. Three minutes as the ghost flies, but he wasn’t about to risk his secret just to race off to see his companion.

“Ten minutes? That’s plenty of time for me to get into some sort of trouble I’m sure.”

Vlad ended the call. Paul always liked the last word and if Vlad didn’t let him have it then the other man would continue to spout absurdities until Vlad got so fed up that he hung up the phone. For some odd reason, Paul seemed to like being hung up on.

Twelve minutes later, Vlad was in front of Paul’s apartment door. As he raised his hand to knock, the door opened. There stood Paul in a pair of jeans that might have been black at some point but repeated washing had faded to a near grey color. Instead of a crisp button down he was wearing a burgundy t shirt that Vlad could nearly see how soft it was. “Get in here before I freeze,” he griped, quickly ushering Vlad into the apartment. It never failed to amuse Vlad how intolerant Paul was of the cold.

“Where can I put the scones?” Vlad asked, glancing critically around the apartment. It was a cluttered sort of tidy with stacks of books and papers piled neatly on the coffee table. The sofa was haphazardly covered in throw blankets and pillows. On the walls were a few floating shelves, each one holding several different models of air and space craft.

“Put them by the bread box,” Paul called over his shoulder as he walked through a doorway that Vlad assumed led to the kitchen. Vlad followed at a more sedate pace, taking in as much of the space as possible. Allowing Vlad into his personal space may have meant nothing to Paul, but Vlad found it to be a very intimate and trusting act.

In the kitchen Vlad found a resounding nothing. “Have I been led here under false pretenses?” he demanded as he deposited the pastries on the counter.

“Don’t get your panties in a twist, we’re going to have dinner,” Paul chuckled as he pulled a pot out of a cabinet. “We just have to make it first.”

“We have to make it? I was under the impression that you wanted to cook for me,” Vlad complained only half seriously. It was always something with Paul, but Vlad had yet to be disappointed.

Paul began rummaging through his kitchen, pulling out ingredients and utensils in some arcane system that only he understood. “And I was under the impression that we were dating,” Paul countered out of nowhere.

Vlad’s guard was instantly up. “Oh? Is that what this is?” he asked cautiously.

“I like to flatter myself by saying yes,” Paul declared from deep in his refrigerator. “And I’ve noticed that you have some issues with intimacy that you don’t want to talk about. I’m fine with that, everyone has baggage. And if you have more than most people, I’m okay with that too because you’re funny and awful and you like it when _I’m_ funny and awful. That’s a rare combination and I intend to keep you around for as long as you’ll have me.”

“Why am I sensing a ‘but’ coming?”

“BUT,” Paul continued as though Vlad had never spoken, “I would like to touch you. And by touch you I don’t mean throw you on the nearest flat surface and have my wicked way with whatever gloriousness you’re hiding under that damn suit. Touch just means touch. I get not holding hands in the park and I would never, ever want to do anything that would jeopardize your position.” With a final glance around the room, Paul began sorting through the mess he had made of the counters. “That’s a lie. I have several things I’d like to do that would definitely put your job at risk. Most of them involve your office. One of them involves a copy machine and not in the way you’re thinking. But those are just happy little fantasies because thinking of your partner is a healthy pass time.”

Vlad shuffled his feet awkwardly, glancing down at the tile floor and then back to the muscled expanse of Paul’s back. It wasn’t as though he was ignoring his attraction to Paul; it had inadvertently come up during some slow afternoons in the very office that Paul had mentioned. After a few moments of silence, Vlad asked, “And so your grand plan was to, what? Lure me to your apartment and talk me to death in retaliation?”

Paul stopped moving so suddenly and completely that Vlad actually took a step forward thinking something was wrong. “Retaliation?” Paul repeatedly quietly. Vlad inched closer as Paul turned around. He looked nearly angry, with his brow furrowed and eyes narrowed. “Of all the stupid-” Eliminating the remaining space between himself and Vlad in a single stride, Paul stared down at him intently. Paul was a giant of a man and Vlad had to tip his head back to maintain eye contact. “I’m trying to tell you that I respect your boundaries and you accuse me of retaliation?”

“I’m not the one who speaks only in half formed ideas and creative insults,” Vlad spat back.

Paul closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “For whatever reason,” he began with his eyes still closed, face turned down as though he was still looking at Vlad, “You don’t want traditional intimacy. That’s fine. More than fine because I want more than that. And I’m trying to make it clear that when you feel like we’ve reached that point, I will be oh so very receptive of just about anything you want. Never, ever doubt that. But for now, with your permission, I would like to cook dinner with you by sharing the same space and touching you as much as you will allow. Intimately and romantically but with no intent for more than what you’ll allow. Have I made myself clear?”

Vlad couldn’t remember Paul ever speaking so directly before, although Vlad had never demanded it before either. They both had their defense mechanisms, he supposed. Slowly, more to settle his own nerves than anything, Vlad reached up and put his palm flat against Paul’s cheek. Blue eyes snapped open, but Paul remained perfectly still. Vlad realized in that moment that he could very easily love this volatile man who would bend himself out of sorts just for Vlad’s comfort. Instead of saying something quite so idiotic, Vlad settled for a simple, “I suppose that would be acceptable.”

Paul’s smile was warmer than the sun, warmer than Vlad’s own fiery core. “Good,” he said sounding so pleased that any lingering doubts Vlad may have had vanished for the time being. He could over-analyze and panic later in the safety of his mansion. For now, there was a meal to prepare.

Vlad’s hand slipped from Paul’s face as the other man returned to the counter. “Take your coat off and roll up your sleeves,” he ordered over his shoulder. Vlad did as he was bid, placing both his winter coat and suit coat on the back of one of the kitchen chairs. By the time he had his sleeves rolled, Paul already had an onion peeled and ready for dicing. “Come here.”

Vlad stepped up to the counter, expecting to be handed something to peel or prepare. Instead Paul caught his arm and pulled him close, sliding Vlad between himself and the counter. Paul was a cool mass at his back, barely touching but indelibly there in a way that Vlad was surprised to find enjoyable. For a moment Vlad was concerned that Paul would be repulsed by the sheer amount of heat that tended to roll off Vlad. He wasn’t supernaturally warm most of the time, but he did run hot. His fears proved unfounded as he felt Paul inch just a little closer. “Sweet sassy molassy you’re warm,” Paul rumbled contentedly. Vlad smiled; Paul liked to tease him about his faux swearing but here the man was, pressed up against his back, nearly purring and the only phrase he could think to use was one of Vlad’s.

Vlad leaned back into the embrace and allowed Paul to guide his hands.


	4. Early Spring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vlad and Paul enjoy a date at the First Annual Amity Park Renaissance Faire, until a dragon and Danny interrupt their afternoon.

Holding a Renaissance Fair had not been Vlad’s idea. It did not even merit a spot on his top ten list of springtime activities to draw tourism into Amity Park. As far as Vlad was concerned, Renaissance Fairs were filled with dirty, lowbrow people attempting to emulate dirty, lowbrow people from a bygone era. There was no way that people would come spend their money to eat large quantities of meat while wearing historically dubious costumes, or whatever other events happened at such gatherings.

That’s what Vlad had thought, and maintained, throughout the entire planning of the affair. He was pleasantly surprised to be wrong, on several counts. The First Annual Amity Park Renaissance Faire had attracted attention from people of all across the state and beyond. Every booth was filled with craftspeople hawking their wares or demonstrating their skills. The grounds were packed with attendees, most in costume ranging from minimal to elaborate. There was fine food and drink to sample, and above the din of the crowd a merry band of minstrels could be heard. Vlad had never been so pleased to be wrong, especially after reading the latest report from the Tourism Board.

“I told you so,” Paul declared as he munched contentedly on a turkey leg larger than Vlad’s forearm.

“Your cheeky comments are not required at this time, thank you,” Vlad returned primly. In truth, Paul had been a driving force behind the proceedings. Vlad had wanted to reject the idea immediately, but with some persuasion, Paul convinced him of the potential benefits. Paul could be so deliciously persuasive when he wanted something. Vlad was considering never agreeing with Paul ever again just so he would have the opportunity to be convinced of the other man’s investment.

“Everyone likes a little ass, but nobody likes a smart ass, right? And here I thought that my ass was one of my most enticing qualities, little, smart, or otherwise.”

‘Little’ was not a word that came to mind when thinking about Paul’s posterior, but Vlad refused to rise to the bait in such a public place. “You mean the ass that you are currently showing?” Vlad said in a low voice, hoping to discourage Paul’s current train of thought.

“If I had known you were into that, I’d have worn something more revealing than this warlock get up. Something with a codpiece-”

“Do you remember this morning when you promised to behave?”

Paul tilted his head to the side and blinked a few times before asking with the utmost sincerity, “Does this not qualify as behaving? I thought I was doing rather well.”

“This is entirely my fault,” Vlad sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes for effect. “I never should have believed you when you promised to-”

“-eldritch blast is just like your powers though, dude!” Vlad stopped mid-sentence, horrified. That was the voice of one of Daniel’s little friends, which inexorably meant that-

“Yeah, but I liked the rogue costume better. Besides, with stealth bonuses like mine…”

-Daniel couldn’t be far behind. Vlad scowled. Of course Daniel would be at the fair, the entire town was in attendance. There had been minimal contact between the two of them since that disastrous football game some months prior. Destruction invariably followed wherever Daniel went; Vlad could already see the colorful tents and banners of the fair going up in flames thanks to Daniel’s carelessness.

“Hello?” Paul said, waving his hand in front of Vlad’s face to draw his attention back. Thankfully he had used the hand not currently gripping a turkey leg. “Vlad? What happened? You look stormy enough to rain out the whole parade.”

“It’s nothing,” Vlad said, drumming up a genuine smile for his beau. It had better be nothing, or his little badger would pay the price.

The two men wandered around the fairgrounds as Vlad mingled with his constituents. Eventually, they stopped beneath the awning near the minstrels to sample the meade and rest their feet.

“Care to dance?” Paul whispered in his ear, leaning far closer than was socially appropriate with a vague gesture to the group of people gyrating awkwardly to the lute music.

“You know how I feel about public displays, my position-”

“Then let’s get to a less public place where the positions I have in mind would be more acceptable to your delicate sensibilities,” Paul pressed, “You’ve made your rounds, that’s enough glad-handing for one day. I’ve got a bottle of wine, some charcuterie…”

“How have you managed to make charcuterie sound like something scandalous and debauched?” Vlad asked rhetorically, taking another sip from his tankard. “And what happened to respecting my boundaries?”

Paul pulled away so he could stare directly into Vlad’s eyes. “Have I crossed a boundary? Tiptoed on the line, maybe, but not crossed. I’m making an offer, informing you of your options, laying it all out on the table. And much like the wine, cheese, and charcuterie we will hopefully be enjoying later, you are welcome to pick, choose, or nibble on as much or as little as you’d like.”

In a given situation, the person with the ability to say ‘no’ is the one with the most power. Vlad had never placed much stock in that adage, as his wealth and abilities afforded him power regardless of people saying yes or no to him. It was different with Paul. Paul wasn’t an obstacle to overcome or a trophy to acquire. He gave himself freely, and Vlad was always given a choice. Being given such agency without having to fight for it was a heady thing for Vlad.

“I suppose-” Vlad began, but an ear-splitting roar cut him off.

A burst of fire illuminated the evening sky over the tents, followed by a gust of wind as a dragon swooped overhead. People scurried and scattered, trying to find shelter from the beast.

“What’s a Renaissance Fair without a dragon?” Paul asked with a strained chuckle as he moved to duck under their table. Vlad did not share his humor at the situation.

“Wait here, I’ll be back soon,” Vlad said, scanning the sky for a flash of green or white.

Paul grabbed his hand, pulling him back down as he went to delve into the mob. “Are you crazy? That thing could swallow you whole!” he exclaimed.

Vlad’s mood had deteriorated so quickly that he wished the dragon would try him in such a way. “My friends’ son is here,” Vlad said, thinking quickly, “I need to ensure his safety.” It wasn’t a complete lie; his goal was to find Daniel before the situation escalated to mass property damage.

“Has anyone ever told you how handsome you look when you’re acting all white-knightly?” Paul asked with a cheeky grin. Any other potential conversation was cut off by the dragon making another pass, swooping even lower this time as she terrorized the fair.

Finding a secluded place to transform was simple enough. Fear made people less perceptive to unnatural occurrences, like energy surges and glowing black rings. Vlad’s standard senses were more acute in this form, and he had a few extra ones beyond the traditional five upon which he could rely. None of those enhancements were typically necessary when dealing with Daniel. Danny Phantom tended to be as obvious as the dragon soaring overhead.

“Hey scaley!” Daniel shouted as he flew after the dragon, “I’m pretty sure you need a permit for that pyrotechnics display!”

Ironically, Daniel was right about the permit.

The dragon whirled around let loose a burst of flame that made even Vlad shield himself behind his cape. As the light faded, Vlad peeked out from behind his cover, expecting to see a charred Daniel Fenton on the ground. To his surprise, Phantom was completely unscathed. In one hand he held a glowing green sword, and on the other a shield. Presumably, the sword and shield were made of a solid form of ecto-energy. Vlad was unaware that Daniel had progressed so far with that particular talent.

“Nice try, but the only things at this fair that need charbroiling are those turkey legs,” Daniel said before lunging forward and sending a wave of ice from the tip of his sword. The ice hit the dragon’s wings, which would have worked had the dragon been real rather than a ghost. Rather than plummeting to the earth as Daniel intended, the dragon hovered in place for a moment before lashing at Daniel with its tail.

Blocking the blow with his shield caused Daniel to careen off into the distance. With the younger halfa distracted, Vlad took the opportunity to circle around the dragon and shock it from the rear. The dragon yelped and jerked away, passing over the tents towards the open field where the joust was meant to be held.

Whirling around, the dragon locked its burning gaze on Vlad. As it opened its mouth to let loose another round of fire, a blow to the back of its head startled it into biting through its own tongue.

“Time to slay a dragon!” Daniel yelled as he slashed at the beast’s neck. Vlad was shocked; he didn’t think Daniel capable of such violence.

Instead of the spectral blade slicing cleanly through the dragon’s flesh as Vlad expected, Daniel neatly sliced through the gold band around its throat. The massive form shifted, rippled, and ultimately collapsed on itself, falling to the grassy field as a ghostly young woman.

Daniel followed the woman down and spoke with her briefly before containing her in the Fenton Thermos. Vlad approached only once the thermos was safely secured on Daniel’s belt; he had no interest in being cramped in such a small container with a dragon.

“I thought that was you, earlier,” Daniel said, hefting his shield a little higher as Vlad approached. “Lemme guess: you had nothing to do with this one, either.”

“I am completely innocent,” Vlad declared in his most insincere voice. Daniel scowled at him.

“Then what are you doing here?”

“Making sure that you don’t cost me several thousand dollars’ worth of property damage. Again.”

“Likely story” Daniel snapped, pointing his blade at Vlad, “If you wanna dance, let’s get this over with. Otherwise, I have other problems to deal with.”

Vlad held up his hands in a placating gesture. “For once, little badger, I have no interest in fighting with you. I have a previous engagement and I would hate to keep them waiting.” Daniel glowered at him for a moment longer before allowing his weapons to dissipate into the ether.

“Fine. But eventually, I’m going to figure out what’s going on around here,” Daniel promised as he turned to fly away.

“You do that,” Vlad sighed, completely uninterested in the younger halfa’s quandaries. Falling gracefully to the ground, Vlad pulled his power back inside his core, reverting to his human guise once more. Hopefully, Paul was still under the table where Vlad had left him. After such a stressful day, Vlad was feeling more than willing to let Paul tempt him with promises of wine, charcuterie, and perhaps something a bit more physical.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "charcuterie" is the meat and other things that go on a cheese board, I just think it's a funny word


	5. Late Spring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danny finally meets Paul Geist, much to Vlad's dismay. Things take a dangerous turn as Geist reveals he's not who he claimed to be. The angst and revelations still leave a few loose ends to be wrapped up. What does Geist want?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter before the epilogue! It's a bit longer than the other chapters. I'm probably going to go back through and rewrite the summaries; I didn't want to give too much away, but I feel that's left them rather bland.

“I have a professional chef on staff, you know,” Vlad drawled, absently swirling the contents of the pre-dinner drink that Paul had mixed for him. It was difficult, even for a palate as refined as Vlad’s, to place what exactly the younger man had poured for him. Paul had, as was his wont, refused to elaborate on what was in the drink. Even after numerous attempts to pry the recipe from him, using all manner of bribery and flattery, all Paul would say was that it was “Vlad’s new favorite drink.” And, damn him and his smug grin, he had been right.

“This is a special occasion,” Paul retorted as he flitted around the kitchen. Vlad hid the barest hint of a smile behind the rim of his glass. If he was a man more inclined to believe in luck or indulge in sentiment, he might have thought something sappy like ‘he was a lucky man’ or ‘they were lucky to have found each other.’ As he possessed neither of those traits, Vlad contented himself with admiring his beloved as Paul stirred and chopped.

“You have yet to inform me what this ‘occasion’ _is_ ,” Vlad said, “It’s not our anniversary, not a birthday, not a holiday…You’ve piqued my curiosity. And my patience.”

“Maybe there is no occasion and I just enjoy the way you look when you’re irritated,” Paul teased, never looking up from the onion he was dicing.

“Cooking me dinner, plying me with alcohol, and providing me with such excellent company are things you consider irritating? By all means, vex me more often.”

“No no no,” Paul chuckled, “Irritating and vexing are two different things. If I wanted to vex you, I’d be doing all of this, except I’d be wearing nothing but a kiss-the-cook-apron.”

 _Vexing indeed_ , Vlad thought as he hummed appreciatively, savoring the mental image that Paul had provided.

*beep*beep*beep*beep*

Oh, fudge bars.

Paul whirled around searching for the source of the beeping. “Is that the smoke alarm? Or the doorbell?” he asked as he checked to make sure that none of the food had burned.

“Neither, it’s,” Vlad floundered for only a moment before deciding that a half truth was the best option, “an alarm for something in my private laboratory. Give me a moment and I’ll have it sorted out.”

“Do you need a hand?”

Allowing Paul into his lab was the last thing Vlad wanted, ever. It would undoubtedly lead to all sorts of questions and speculation. Paul was as intelligent as he liked to boast, and given all the evidence, he would inevitably figure out Vlad’s secret. Or worse, he would come to a wrong but no less damning conclusion. “No, no,” Vlad waived the offer off as casually as he could. “It’s nothing I can’t handle. Besides, I’d hate for all your hard work to go to waste.”

Paul shrugged and turned back to the stovetop. Normally he would have argued simply for the joy of being difficult, but Vlad knew how much pride Paul took in cooking for him. Taking advantage of his vanity in such a way took no effort for someone as accustomed to manipulation as Vlad. “My hard work? A few minutes ago you were trying to persuade me to let your chef take over. Where is this sudden appreciation coming from?”

Vlad ignored him in favor of heading briskly down to the lab. Paul hadn’t actually been expecting a rebuttal and always favored having the last word, anyway. The moment he was out of view of the kitchen, Vlad slipped down through the floor. Whatever Skulker had brought was unlikely to be worth more than an evening with Paul. The bounty hunter was going to pay dearly for the interruption.

Instead of Skulker standing stoically at attention in the corner of the lab, Vlad was greeted by a puzzled Daniel, sitting cross legged on one of the worktables with his brows furrowed. The younger halfa was in his human form, clearly not expecting a fight despite being in his arch-nemesis's inner sanctum.

“I’m confused,” Daniel blurted out. Vlad was too stunned to retort. What was Daniel doing in his lab? How had he known to ring the bell? “If you’re here, then who’s up there?”

“What-how-…that’s none of your-” Vlad struggled to respond, but Daniel wasn’t really listening.

“It took a lot of practice, but I eventually figured out that it’s not you,” Daniel declared firmly as though Vlad was in the correct headspace to keep up with his nonsense. Daniel and Paul in the same place at the same time was a nightmare Vlad had never considered. Daniel had to leave. Immediately.

“I don’t have time to figure out what you’re here for or how you got in,” Vlad growled in his most menacing voice, flicking his eyes red, “Get out.”

Daniel had been shaking his head ‘no’ before Vlad had even finished talking. Vlad should have known better than to try intimidating him; it had never worked before. “This is important!” he insisted, staring up at the ceiling in the general direction of the kitchen and therefore Paul. “It took forever to get it but I can identify your ectosignature. You’re _you_. But this new signature…it’s so familiar but I can’t place it! It’s none of the other ghosts I know, I’ve already checked.”

“You can identify my ectosignature?” Vlad demanded, torn between impressed and irate. That Daniel was able to master such a nuanced power after only a few years of having his powers shouldn’t have surprised Vlad. The boy had an uncanny talent for rapid skill acquisition that Vlad begrudgingly envied. Future plans involving Daniel would have to take this new skill into account.

“Focus Vlad, that’s not the important thing right now,” Daniel barked, snapping his fingers in Vlad’s face. Vlad snarled and swatted the boy’s hand away. “Although I’m glad someone appreciates my hard work, Sam and Tucker thought this was a stupid power Wait, that wasn’t my point. Who is in your kitchen right now?”

“That’s hardly any of your business,” Vlad evaded bluntly.

“They’ve left their ectosignature all over town! Every ghost that has attacked recently, all the ‘accidents’ around town, whoever is in your kitchen was the one responsible!”

Vlad should have known that this was more of Daniel’s misguided heroics. If Paul wasn’t waiting for him upstairs, Vlad would have tossed the little badger out himself. Unfortunately, that would take time and make enough noise to attract Paul’s attention which was exactly what Vlad did not want. Since violence wasn’t an option, Vlad was going to have to resort to reason and logic. Those had never been his and Daniel’s strong suits where the other was concerned.

“That is utterly impossible,” Vlad began, “because the individual upstairs is not a ghost. He is a friend whom I know intimately well, and I can assure you he has no connection to whatever you think has been going on in town. Furthermore, as the only other being you know who can sense ectosignatures, I sense nothing paranormal about him.”

There was a beat of silence as Daniel stared at him impassively.

“You know I don’t believe you, right?” Daniel deadpanned as he began floating up through the ceiling. Vlad made a panicked lunge after Daniel’s leg, but the boy’s reflexes had apparently improved as he jerked the limb just out of Vlad’s grasp.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Vlad hissed as he followed Daniel up. This was audacious, even for Daniel. “Coming into my house, intending to harass my guest-”

“Your guest has been terrorizing the town!” Daniel insisted loudly.

Vlad slapped a hand over the boy’s mouth as a reflex. He would not be put through the humiliation of Paul coming out of the kitchen to find Vlad arguing in a dark hallway with a teenage boy. “Quiet!” Vlad shushed as loudly as he dared. “You have no right to—”

Daniel, uninterested in Vlad’s protestation, chose that moment to lick the hand Vlad had been using to cover his mouth. It took all of Vlad’s willpower not to yelp in disgust at Daniel’s childishness as he jerked his hand away.

“Just let me see him!” Daniel pleaded, finally lowering his voice to a more clandestine level. “One look, I’ll check his ectosignature, and I’ll be out of your stupid ponytailed hair.”

Vlad rubbed his temples with both hands as though he could physically hold back the tension that inevitably followed every conversation with Daniel. On the one hand, Daniel had broken into his house, disrupted his evening, not to mention licked him. Those were not actions that Vlad was inclined to take lightly from anyone, but especially not from Daniel who frankly should have known better than to take such liberties. On the other hand, the sooner Daniel got what he wanted the sooner he would leave. Vlad was opposed to capitulating to Daniel’s desires on principle, but he did enjoy when Daniel was wrong. Daniel was absolutely, unequivocally wrong about Paul; Vlad refused to even entertain the notion that the younger halfa could sense something in Paul that Vlad himself could not.

Vlad decided to choose the lesser evil.

“If it will set your mind at ease and hasten your departure from my home, then by all means,” Vlad said, urging Daniel forward with a hand on his back. He felt Daniel tense at the touch and almost smiled; the boy’s sense of self-preservation kicked in at the oddest moments. “Paul is—”

“Paul is what?” the man in question asked as he poked his head out of the kitchen. “Be careful how you finish that sentence, dessert absolutely depends on your response.”

Vlad and Daniel lurched to a halt at the exact same moment. Paul was grinning at them both with his trademark charming-enough-to-cut-yourself-on smile. Vlad floundered for a moment, wracking his brain for a suitable response to this incogitable happening. “Paul, darling, this is—”

“What are you doing here?” Daniel demanded tremulously. Vlad couldn’t see his face but the wavering in his voice was not something that Vlad had ever heard from Daniel before. “That’s not possible, you can’t be here!” Whirling around to look at Vlad, Daniel demanded, “What did you **_do_**?”

Vlad stared down into the wide blue eyes of the only other halfa in existence and saw true fear there for the first time. After all they had seen and done, after everything that Vlad himself had inflicted on Daniel, Vlad’s boyfriend was what finally paralyzed the great Danny Phantom? How did they even know each other?

“He didn’t do anything, pay no attention to him,” Paul drawled as he walked out of the kitchen, pulling Vlad’s attention away from Daniel’s scared, accusing face. “It is possible. I am here. Any other rhetorical questions you’d like to get out of the way?”

“What do you want?”

“A great many things,” Paul mused as he leaned his shoulder against the wall. Everything from his tone to his posture was casual, which somehow seemed to make Daniel even more on edge. “Did you enjoy your little mystery hunt? I was rather proud of it. And of you, for solving it right on time. I’ve been telling Vlad all evening that this was a special day, but he wouldn’t believe me.”

Vlad was reeling. Paul couldn’t have been responsible for the recent hauntings in Amity Park, it was anathema to everything Vlad knew of the man. Impossible. Yet here he was, admitting to Daniel that he had been the mastermind. How? What was going on?

“So you were toying with me,” Daniel spat, “Why? To keep me busy while you did – what?”

Finally finding his voice, Vlad demanded, “What are you two talking about? What is going on here?”

“I needed you out of my hair for a while,” Paul continued as though Vlad had never spoken. “Couldn’t have you disrupting my plans before I was ready. And it was good for you! You learned a whole new skill that could have taken years to master if I hadn’t intervened. Patience never was one of your virtues, after all. You should be thanking me.”

“At least I still have some virtues, unlike you, you manipulative piece of-”

“Whoah there Danny,” Paul interrupted as he pushed off the wall and walked closer to the two halfas. “Where did you even learn a word like that?”

Vlad’s confusion was rapidly transforming into incandescent rage. He was being ignored, he had clearly been lied to by a man he thought he could trust, and for reasons beyond his understanding, Daniel was inextricably tied to whatever was going on.

“Paul, I demand to know what-”

“Paul?” Daniel interrupted incredulously, glancing back and forth between Vlad and his soon to be ex-lover. “You’re joking. You went with _Paul_?”

“He never suspected a thing,” Paul cackled. Vlad couldn’t control the flush that sprang to his cheeks. When Vlad had contemplated how humiliating it would be to have Paul and Daniel meet, he could never have predicted this…whatever this was. “Paul Terrance Geist. It went right over his head.”

“That doesn’t surprise me,” Danny muttered. Turning to Vlad he explained slowly with as much condescension as Vlad had ever heard him use before, “Paul Ter Geist. **_Poltergeist_**. Get it?”

Poltergeist. Fucking poltergeist?!? Paul had told Vlad what he was from the start and Vlad had been too blind to notice. What else had Paul blinded him to?

“You’ve played me for a fool,” Vlad snarled. Daniel had been right, which stung for reasons all its own, but Vlad’s pride had also taken a blow. He was a cautious man who prided himself on reading people. Moreover, his power as a ghost had been called into question; he still sensed nothing from not-Paul. “Who are you really and what do you want?”

“He still hasn’t figured it out, even with both of us standing here,” not-Paul chuckled. How had Vlad not realized how sinister that smooth, dark chocolate laugh was?

“Figured what out?”

“Take a good look at us, fruitloop,” not-Paul said in his most patronizing drawl.

Fruitloop? How could he possibly know about that?

Not-Paul took several steps closer to Daniel, so they were nearly side by side, and held out his arms in what Vlad assumed was meant to be a revealing gesture. Daniel, for his part, alternated between glaring warily at not-Paul and staring at the ground. He refused to look at Vlad. Vlad, however, could not stop looking at Daniel. His little badger who had inherited the best parts of his father’s features and his mother’s temper. Daniel, who could nearly best Vlad in both combat and wit. He was the companion, the equal, that Vlad had been searching for and discarded once someone more appropriate and attainable had come along.

Once he was satisfied that he had indeed taken a good look at Daniel, he switched his attention to not-Paul. What was he supposed to be looking for? Daniel was easy; Vlad could look at him and see every part that made up the whole of his being. He couldn’t see Paul that way, they had known each other neither as long nor as deeply as Vlad knew Daniel. On the surface, Paul was handsome. He was tall, broad at the shoulders and narrow at the hips, with striking blue eyes and long black hair. Vlad refused to think of how it felt sliding through his fingers; that was not an appropriate memory for the moment. He was irascible, clever, incapable of giving or receiving compliments, and always had to have the last word.

“You’re…related?” he asked in confusion. They looked similar, at least, which was something Vlad was unwilling to scrutinize too closely. Vlad thought he knew most of the Fenton relatives.

“Close,” not-Paul acquiesced. “Closer than that, closer than kin.”

Daniel opened his mouth, undoubtedly to argue, but not-Paul made a gesture that Vlad didn’t understand which caused Daniel to fall silent. Whatever that gesture was or meant, Vlad needed to learn it, because he had yet to find anything that could silence Daniel in such a way.

Closer than kin? A clone, perhaps? Had one of the failed attempts at cloning Daniel succeeded? Daniel had taken in the failed female experiment, it was not beyond the realm of possibility for him to have taken in another clone. Current circumstances made this theory more plausible: a clone made of his and Vlad’s DNA would undoubtedly share the best and worst of their combined traits, as well as a flair for the dramatic and a penchant for betrayal.

“Clone?”

“The DNA was never stabilized,” not-Paul waived the notion off impatiently, “The answer is literally right in front of you.”

“He and I are-” Daniel piped in, but not-Paul cut him off with a snarl.

“No, you’re not going to ruin this for me. I intend to savor the look on his face when he finally figures it out.”

The encounter was dragging on too long for Vlad’s comfort. Figuring out Paul’s true identity was the first step in finding out his motives, beyond the inherent satisfaction of Vlad’s continued humiliation. Vlad looked from Daniel to the other man, both standing silent under his scrutiny, and wracked his brain for alternatives. If not a relative or a clone, then what? It’s not like they could be the same person, for all they looked and acted like-

Black hair. Blue eyes. Sharp wit and shaper tongue. Perpetual need to have the last word. Backhanded compliments.

_Some of us still have to work in the morning_ _// Some of us have actual work to do_

_I’m quite the catch // I’m the better catch anyway_

_Another time, Mayor // We’ll have to save this for another time_

_Care to dance? // If you wanna dance, let's get this over with_

_My hard work? // I’m glad someone appreciates my hard work_

_I was unaware that you had any virtue left // At least I still have some virtues, unlike you_

No. No no no no no no no. Vlad refused to accept it. He would have known, surely. He should have sensed it, realized on some fundamental level. Because if he had known, he never would have…he couldn’t have…

“You’ve made your point, Dan, leave him alone,” Daniel, little Danny, ordered as he stepped between Vlad and…whatever Dan was. How was such a thing possible, even with their powers?

“Have I made my point?” the older one asked as he stalked closer. Vlad once mused how odd it was that Paul— ** _Dan_** was either unaware of his physical size or had no interest using it to his advantage. It became immediately apparent that just because Vlad had never observed it didn’t mean that Dan was incapable of it. In the dim hallway, Dan loomed over them, casting a shadow so long that Vlad knew it had to be supernatural. Vlad’s next exhale billowed out in a cloud of vapor unrelated to his ghost sense. A chill permeated the air that Vlad couldn’t stave off even with his fiery core. Worst of all, worse than the fangs that were pricking lightly into Dan’s lower lip, were his glowing green eyes. Seeing Danny’s green eyes gleaming at him from that treacherous, beloved face made Vlad’s stomach lurch. Danny tensed but stood his ground between the two men, crouching into a more defensive stance. “How could I have possibly made my point if you don’t even know what I was doing here all this time.”

Daniel didn’t need to know what his older counterpart had been doing. For the sake of Vlad’s last few shreds of dignity, Daniel could not be privy to that information. Let Daniel think that Dan had been playing him for a fool all this time. Working Vlad over like some novice instead of the criminal mastermind he was supposed to be. No mention had to be made of the days spent laughing hand-in-hand or the nights spent lip-locked, tangled together in the groans and sighs of passion.

“At first I thought it was Vlad,” Danny began in his trying-to-figure-this-out voice. Vlad swallowed to ease the dryness in his throat. For all that he liked to insult Daniel’s intelligence, the boy was truly brilliant when he put his mind to it. He was going to figure it out, and then Vlad’s humiliation would be complete. “But then with the shapeshifter, he had been up in the commentator’s box the whole time. I eventually realized that it wasn’t his ectosignature, after the dragon at the faire. It was almost as familiar though, I just couldn’t place it.”

“Most ghosts never have a reason, or the opportunity, to sense their own ectosignature,” Dan conceded. “I knew I could hide myself, fool any other ghost in existence, all except-”

“Yourself,” Danny jumped in, “You couldn’t hide from yourself. So you needed to keep me busy, and you used that caveat to your advantage to keep me invested. But what were you doing that you needed to keep me so distracted?”

Dan grinned and Vlad’s stomach lurched. Now that he knew what to look for, he could see his little badger in every expression. How had he not noticed before?

“I had to keep you away from your favorite obsession so I could indulge in it a bit myself,” Dan said cryptically. Vlad was lost, but Danny’s ears turned a bit red at the tips.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Daniel lied, obviously knowing no one believed him. He was trapped between the two people who knew him best in the world, there could be no lies between them here.

“Hah!” Dan barked as he circled Vlad and Danny. The hallway was wide, but not so wide that Dan could pass around them comfortably. Vlad and Danny stepped closer to each other in an attempt to put some distance between themselves and Dan. This made Dan chuckle as he eyed them up like a buyer inspecting their potential purchase. “Please, you’re both as bad as the other. There was no reason for you to have suspected Vlad as the culprit behind my deception. That was your own obsession causing you to interpret the evidence in a way that satisfied your need to seek him out.

“And you, Vlad! You spend twenty years pining after the same woman, and within a day of meeting Danny you shifted your focus almost entirely. Danny might have started as an avenue to get to Maddie, but that didn’t last long. Now he’s your obsession.”

“Only because he’s the only other halfa!”

“It was natural, as the only other halfa, to pursue my interest in his development!”

Both Vlad and Danny objected at the same time with the same weak explanation. It might have been funny were it not for the unknown element of Dan circling them like a shark.

“His development?” Dan crooned, and Vlad knew he had made a mistake. “And how appreciative you’ve been of my development! So complimentary, and more gentlemanly than I could have ever expected.”

“What?!?” Danny squawked, whirling around to look at Vlad who could not meet the his desperately probing gaze. “NO.”

“Oh yes, Danny. Do you want to know how he tastes when—”

“Enough!” Vlad bellowed, startling all three of them. Dan stopped pacing and stared at Vlad expectantly, one eyebrow raised. That only served to stoke Vlad’s ire. He was done playing games, done being humiliated, done with the look of fear and disgust that had not left Daniel’s young face. “You’ve made your grand set up, you’ve had your monologue, now tell us what you want! What was the purpose in all this, in twisting me around your little finger and leading Daniel on a wild hunt?”

“If it’s any comfort, you’re just collateral damage,” Dan said almost apologetically. “It’s Danny I’m here for. My continued existence sort of depends on certain variables becoming, well, less variable.”

“What happened to being inevitable?” Danny spat, shifting once more to stand between Vlad and the abomination that Danny was destined to grow into. It was almost as though he was trying to protect Vlad from Dan, though it was far too late for that. Where had Daniel’s protective streak been all those months ago when this began?

“Oh, we are inevitable. Think of this as an assured quality of life improvement. You’re going to become this,” Dan said with a grand gesture at himself that made Vlad feel nauseous, “no matter what. But I needed to ensure that it happens in the best possible way. Really, I’m just looking out for your best interests.”

“You’ve already tried that by murdering my friends and family,” Danny pointed out, and Vlad really wished they could take a moment to unpack that statement, but it was very clearly not the time for such questions. “And that didn’t work out. Seducing Vlad,” he stumbled over the words in his haste to get them out of his mouth, “isn’t quite as traumatic as attempted murder.”

“No, but it does allow me to do this,” Dan said as two white energy rings appeared around his chest.

The first thing that hit Vlad was the sheer _power_ rolling off the other ghost. How had Dan been able to hide all of that? Physically, Dan was much the same. His height and build had not changed, but the tight black and white suit highlighted how utterly massive he was. A cheeky grin revealed sharp incisors much like Vlad’s own. Dan’s long hair floated gently behind him like white fire.

Rather than focusing on the threat to their lives, as would have been wise, Vlad turned his attention to Daniel. One day, this is what Daniel would become: so intimidating and powerful that it made Vlad’s throat tighten uncomfortably just being near him. That was the least surprising bombshell of the evening.

“You’re still-?” Daniel squawked, jerking back and tumbling into Vlad in shock. Vlad held him steady. Whatever that half-formed statement was meant to convey was beyond Vlad. As soon as they were out of danger, Daniel had a lot of explaining to do. Vlad vainly wished that he could get his answers without having to reciprocate in kind.

“Obviously,” Dan drawled with a roll of his eyes. “I think you’ve asked enough questions for one evening. I’m feeling generous, so I’ll give you a head start. You’ve got until the count of three. One.”

Danny sprang into action as though he had been electrocuted. Grabbing Vlad’s hand, he hauled them both down through the floor back towards the lab. Vlad allowed himself to be dragged.

“Is your portal open?” Danny demanded as they dropped through the ceiling.

“You want to lure him to the Ghost Zone?” Vlad asked incredulously. Why not just fight him in the lab? Between Danny, Vlad, and the Fenton thermos, they might be able to-

“Two.”

Danny jerked on the hand he still held captive. “No time, come on!” he yelled, firing an ectoblast at the button to open the portal. That would be annoying to clean, later. Danny took a running leap, Vlad in tow, towards the portal. At the very last moment as they were entering the Ghost Zone, Danny triggered his transformation. Vlad allowed the energy to pass through him as well, watching in fascination as the rings changed from white to black as they crossed where the two halfa’s hands were still joined.

“We have to get him to Clockwork,” Danny said as he scanned the horizon in what Vlad knew to be a futile attempt to get his bearing. Vlad had no idea who Clockwork was but there was little time to demand to be made privy to the nuances of Daniel’s plan.

“Don’t you have a thermos?”

“No point, he can break out. We’ll have to get him closer to Clockwork before I can use it on him.”

“Three.”

Everything went black.

Vlad twisted and turned, or thought he did, looking for something, anything in the darkness. There was nothing, no light at all. Night vision was the most basic of his abilities, but this was apparently not standard darkness. When he tried to summon his powers, pull energy into has hands to light the way, he could feel the darkness _feed_ on it. The abyss swallowed around his hands, eating the light energy before it could fully form.

Shouting was out of the question. Giving his position away to Daniel would also mean revealing it to Dan. When he reached out with his senses, Vlad was aware of Daniel’s presence all around him. Or was it Dan’s presence? Or a trick?

A hand grabbed Vlad’s arm and his immediate reaction was to strike out. He landed a solid hit in what he guessed was the other person’s gut. The impact made no noise and the other person was silent despite the fact that Vlad’s punches in his ghost form were more than enough to crumple a car. The hand slid down his arm until it was wrapped around Vlad’s own. It was slightly smaller than his and, now that Vlad was focusing, it felt cold. Daniel. Hopefully.

Allowing himself to be led through the darkness was one of the hardest things Vlad had ever done in his life. It seemed to go on for an eternity. Then, as suddenly as it arrived, the darkness vanished.

Daniel let go of Vlad’s hand to rub at his own eyes.

“I’d like to presume that if you had that particular power, I’d know about it,” Vlad said for lack of anything better.

“I’m guessing I will one day,” Daniel replied as he blinked away the last of whatever sensation was troubling him. “I could… **see** isn’t the right word, but it’s not wrong either.”

“Wonderful,” Vlad muttered. For his own mental wellbeing, Vlad refused to dwell on the fact that young Daniel would one day grow into an obscenely powerful, unfairly attractive, undeniably sinister man. Those thoughts could wait, along with all the questions that Daniel would be forced to answer.

“C’mon, we’ve gotta go before he-”

“You weren’t thinking of leaving without me, were you?” Dan demanded sarcastically as he appeared behind Daniel. Daniel whirled around a let loose one of his infamous ghostly wails. Rather than being blasted back like everyone else, including Vlad, when subjected to that particular power, Dan was completely unfazed.

Vlad lunged forward, sending out a shockwave of ecto-energy as Daniel dropped, exhausted from using his ultimate ability but not enough to lose his transformation. Vlad’s attack sailed harmlessly off into the ghost zone. Where had Dan-

“Cute,” Dan whispered in Vlad’s ear. Vlad tensed, tried to turn to face his adversary, but found himself immobilized by a hand around his throat. Electric shocks wracked Vlad’s body. His vision turned hazy. “Don’t take this personally, darling. This really had nothing to do with you. It was all for Danny’s benefit. You were just a delightful side benefit.”

Vlad pushed the rising panic and self-loathing to the back of his mind as he attempted to remain conscious. Now he understood Daniel’s fear from earlier, outside the kitchen. It wasn’t just Dan’s power that made him a monster.

“Leave him alone!” Danny shouted as he kicked at Dan. His older self grabbed the offending limb in his free hand. With one final shock, he dropped Vlad to focus on Danny. The arrogance of discarding Vlad as a non-threat should have been insulting, but Vlad had learned that Dan’s self-confidence was never misplaced.

“You’ll thank me for this later, once your curiosity gets the better of you,” Dan sighed.

“What does that even mean?” Danny demanded as he tried to jerk his leg out of Dan’s iron grip.

“You’re not actually as dumb as everyone has you convinced you are, you’ll figure it out in time.”

The telltale blue-white beam of the Fenton Thermos opened up below them. Vlad watched, mouth agape, as the clone in Dan’s hand dissolved as he spiraled into the only consistently effective Fenton gadget.

“It can’t be that simple,” Vlad said, eyeing the thermos in disbelief. “After all he put us through-”

“Less talking, more flying,” Daniel ordered as he shot off deeper into the ghost zone. “We have to get him to Clockwork before he breaks out.”

Vlad had little choice but to follow.

* * *

The thermos was in decidedly worse shape by the time they arrived at Clockwork’s domain. Dents riddled the surface and sparks had begun to fly intermittently from around the cap. Every time the device rattled, both Daniel’s grip and his jaw tightened. The singular benefit of the tension from keeping watch over the thermos was that it prevented them from engaging in the imminent discussion of how, exactly, they came to be in this situation.

“We’re almost there,” Danny said, the first words he had spoken in…since the fight with Dan. Time moved oddly in the Ghost Zone. Vlad had no idea how long they had been flying, and he only had the vaguest notion of how far they had traveled.

Daniel headed toward the clocktower at the heart of the domain with an air of ease obviously born of familiarity. Vlad followed closely, eyeing their surroundings with the caution he had learned after years exploring the Ghost Zone. Even the friendliest of ghosts required constant vigilance with every interaction. His employees, Skulker and vultures, were no exception. Vlad doubted that a ghost like Clockwork, who commanded a realm so vast and distorted, could be trusted the way Daniel wanted. Everything about their surroundings told Vlad that this was not a place to trespass upon lightly.

“What happened?” Daniel demanded as they entered a large chamber with some sort of viewing portal. In front of the portal hovered the ghost in question. Clockwork’s purple cloak prevented Vlad from seeing his features. The constant shifting Vlad could see beneath the cloak did nothing to set his mind at ease.

Clockwork stretched a withered hand out from beneath his mantle. Daniel lobbed the damaged thermos through the air.

“Careful!” Vlad barked, lurching forward on instinct to catch the thermos.

Vlad’s concerns proved unfounded when the thermos landed perfectly in Clockwork’s waiting hand. “Vlad Plasmius,” he said as he turned. Whatever Vlad had been expecting, the constantly shifting yet expressionless face that greeted him certainly wasn’t it. “We meet at last. Although in many ways, I feel as though we’ve been acquainted for years.”

“I can’t say the feeling is mutual,” Vlad replied slowly. Vlad’s gaze flickered briefly to Daniel hoping for some reassurance, but the younger halfa had already pressed further into the room and was heading towards the viewing portal.

“Can we please take care of that before you start exchanging pleasantries?”

“He’s contained well enough for now, you have my word.”

“It can’t be that easy. After all this, the drawn out reveal and the drama, the wild goose chase—and the fight? What was THAT? Why was he pulling his punches? How, why, ugh!”

“What do you mean he was ‘pulling his punches’?” Vlad asked, certain that he was not going to like the answer.

Daniel’s mouth snapped shut and he glared off into the distance. In light of Daniel’s recalcitrance, Clockwork explained, “Daniel is, or will be, the most powerful ghost to ever have existed. His older self could have killed you with no more effort than you use while taking a single breath. In other timelines, he has, thousands upon thousands without remorse.”

Daniel made a frustrated noise and floated across the room to look at what appeared to be a shelf full of oddities.

“It is not something he enjoys being reminded of,” Clockwork added for Vlad’s benefit. Hooking the thermos onto his belt, Clockwork turned his attention back to Daniel. “He deserves an explanation. You have until I return from depositing Dan where he belongs.” Daniel gave no indication of acknowledgement, but Clockwork did not require one as he immediately headed through the viewing portal.

Vlad took a moment to observe Daniel’s tense posture as he floated angrily on the other side of the room. Despite Clockwork’s mandate, perhaps now was not the best time for explanations. Waiting for tempers to cool would undoubtedly be the better part of valor.

“Stop staring at me,” Daniel snapped, “Just get over here so we can get this over with.”

Against his better judgment, Vlad floated cautiously to Daniel’s side. He did not want to do this. Things between the two of them were irreparably changed, and Vlad was not in the right emotional state to begin examining what the consequences might be. The pain in his chest, writhing feelings of betrayal and humiliation, had not yet abated. Now that the danger had passed, those feelings were only going to intensify.

“It’s a long story so I’ll try to make this quick,” Daniel began. On the shelf before them was another Fenton Thermos. It was in better shape than the one Clockwork had taken, but not by much. “A couple years ago, I was going to cheat on a test. Which apparently would have turned me into the ultimate evil, so the Observers had Clockwork try to kill me. That backfired, we ended up time traveling to the future, which was a shitty dystopian hellscape. In that timeline, an explosion at the Nasty Burger killed my friends and family. You adopted me, and I convinced you to help me get rid of my humanity. You did, but then I ripped Plasmius out of you and Phantom and Plasmius…fused? I guess? Then I murdered my human half and destroyed the human world and the Ghost Zone.”

“Daniel, I-”

“Don’t,” Daniel interrupted, looking away from the dilapidated thermos for the first time to glare at Vlad. “Just, let me finish. Then you can say whatever.

“Older me came back in time to make sure the explosion at the Nasty Burger went off just right, so that things would fall into place and he would continue to exist. He said we were inevitable. Then I kicked his ass, put him in a thermos, and gave him to Clockwork. Obviously, my friends and family survived, which I had assumed was the key to not turning into an all-powerful, evil monster. Guess destiny has other plans.”

“Of all the revelations we’ve been subjected to today, the fact that you will become immeasurably powerful is the least surprising,” Vlad admitted, though it pained him. That thought had been bouncing around his head since Daniel showed up in his lab, claiming to be able to identify individual ectosignatures.

“Yeah, well, you know what was unpleasantly surprising? You and evil-older-me dating. That’s just…I don’t even have words. ‘Gross’ doesn’t even **BEGIN** to describe it.”

Vlad was also at a loss for words. Everything he had loved about Paul’s personality was something he had always hated about Daniel. “He tricked me,” Vlad muttered.

“Duh,” Danny retorted with a snort of amusement. How had Vlad forgotten that deception was another of Daniel’s many talents?

“I don’t expect you to understand,” Vlad said waspishly.

“Oh yeah?” Danny demanded, turning to face Vlad fully. “Stop me if I get something wrong. He showed up out of nowhere, threw you off balance, said a bunch of stuff to catch your interest, then backed off so you’d come after him.” Vlad wasn’t sure what emotion his face was conveying, but Daniel continued, “I _am_ him, remember?”

“I am well aware of his identity by this point, I don’t need you constantly reminding me of my folly!”

“Too bad, fruitloop, because every time you see my face you’re going to be seeing him! Get used to it!” Daniel yelled, throwing his arms out to the side much like Dan had done less than a few hours earlier. The similarities, now that Vlad could see them, made him nauseous.

Vlad was done. He was exhausted, mentally and physically. Leaning in close to Daniel, so that they were nearly nose to nose, Vlad growled, “And what makes you think that after all this, I would ever willingly put myself in a position where I have to see you again? Haven’t you done enough damage, past, present, or future?”

Without waiting for a reply, Vlad took off flying out of Clockwork’s citadel. He needed to be alone.

* * *

At some point, the solid black that had permeated his mind had slowly begun to fade to grey. Groaning, Vlad shifted slightly so he could hide his eyes in his arm. That slight shift was all he could manage; his bones felt as though they had been turned to lead, and his head was throbbing in time with the pounding of his heartbeat. Where was that bottle? A little hair of the dog might help with the headache…

“Vlad?” the last person he ever wanted to hear from again called from the distance, “Are you okay? Where are you?”

Maybe, if Vlad was very, very quiet, his unwelcome guest would give up and leave. Or maybe he could pretend to be asleep! Surely Daniel wouldn’t bother someone who was asleep.

Footsteps from the hall were getting louder and louder. Vlad groaned and hid his face more fully into the crook of his arm. He didn’t want to be seen like this. He didn’t want to face Daniel. It was all too much.

“Vlad?” Daniel asked again, coming around the sofa to where Vlad was curled up on the floor. A cool hand touched his shoulder, shaking lightly. That slight motion caused his stomach to roll. “What did you **do**? The mansion looks like you went ten rounds with Behemoth.”

Vlad took a deep breath to steel his nerves (and his stomach), rolled over and opened his eyes. The first thing he saw was Daniel crouched over him, glowing eyes and brow furrowed with concern. Beyond Daniel, Vlad could see a little of the damage he had inflicted the day before. Holes in the walls, furniture broken, ectoplasm congealing into the carpets…he had made quite the mess. It was justified at the time, but what began as a physical outlet for his troubled emotions had turned into drunken destruction and self-pity.

“Got drunk,” he replied succinctly, or tried to, given that mouth was so dry that his tongue felt like cotton wool.

Daniel sighed and stood up. “Wait here,” he ordered. Vlad wasn’t in much of a state to do anything else.

A few minutes later, Daniel returned with a glass of water and two aspirin. Vlad attempted to smile at Daniel out of gratitude for the unexpected aid, but it felt more like a grimace. Straightening up off the floor to lean against the remains of the couch, Vlad took the pills and waited for Daniel to speak.

“I’ve spent the past two days trying to convince myself that you were right, that never seeing each other again was the only way to get over this whole thing. Sam and Tucker were ecstatic. But the more I think about it, the less sure I am that it’s a good idea.”

“And why might that be?” Vlad asked, taking another sip of water to soothe the scratch in his throat.

“Dan only succeeded because he knew how to take advantage of the fact that you’re a sad, lonely, bitter guy with no friends,” Daniel explained. “Maybe this wouldn’t have happened if I had…”

“If you had what? Capitulated to my demands to become my protégé?” Vlad asked incredulously. “Don’t be absurd. It would have been anathema to your character to give in to me, to allow yourself to be shaped into the mold I had envisioned. I wanted to control you, which would have left me no less hollow than I am now. As much as I would love to blame you for this whole catastrophe, none of this is your fault.”

Daniel’s frown only deepened. “But-” he began, but Vlad would have none of it.

“None of this is your fault,” Vlad repeated firmly. The time for wallowing in regret anger had passed. As much as Vlad was inclined to let old wounds fester, he could not allow this to destroy him. More importantly, he could not let it destroy Daniel.

“Okay,” Daniel said, though Vlad could tell it would take more than words to make Daniel believe him.

Daniel cautiously extended a hand towards Vlad to help him off the floor. Vlad almost laughed; he was in no state to try anything, but that Daniel assumed he could even after a bender was a welcome boost to his bruised ego. Vlad accepted the hand in the spirit it was given, pulling himself up and beginning to brush the dust and debris from his clothes. His tie and jacket were gone, one shoe was missing, and there were green ectoplasm stains on his white shirt. He had never been so physically and mentally disheveled in his life.

“Anyway, I came over to make sure you were okay and see if you wanted to talk,” Daniel said. Vlad glanced up from inspecting his clothes to see Daniel had shoved his hands in his pockets and was rocking back and forth. Either he was up to something, or he was nervous. Given the circumstances, Vlad was inclined to believe the latter. Maybe it was time he started giving Daniel the benefit of the doubt. If Daniel hadn’t exposed Dan, there was no telling how long Vlad would have been strung along.

“Talk?”

Nodding jerkily, Daniel explained, “We didn’t exactly have a productive conversation the other day after Clockwork left. There’s still a lot to talk about. If you want. I can make breakfast, if you haven’t absolutely totaled your kitchen.”

Vlad recognized an olive branch when it was being extended to him. Lessening hostilities was going to be a long, unpleasant process, but as he look at Daniel, he figured it might be worth it. After all, Vlad had only ever really wanted a companion.

“It’s not going to be that simple,” Vlad warned as they made their way through the wreckage of his home.

“Cooking breakfast is super simple, maybe you’d know that if you didn’t rely on ordering a personal chef around,” Daniel snarked, purposefully misinterpreting Vlad’s statement. One of the many mannerisms he shared with Paul/Dan. Instead of anger, or pain, or any other emotion that Vlad had expected to feel when reminded of Dan, he only felt amused.

“How did you learn to cook?” Vlad asked as the phased through the rubble blocking their path. He had never gotten around to asking Paul/Dan that question, which was fine. In time, he would stop thinking about Paul/Dan and his similarities to Daniel entirely.

“If I didn’t cook, I wouldn’t eat,” Daniel explained as he rummaged through the dark kitchen. The kitchen appeared relatively untouched by Vlad’s outburst. “Mom and dad get caught up in the lab or on an investigation, Jazz refused to be subjected to the patriarchal idea that women should do all the cooking, so I taught myself. Omelet?”

A burst of energy from Daniel caused the stove to turn on, the pan to fly from its cupboard, and ingredients to float out of the fridge. Vlad raised an eyebrow at the display.

“What?” Daniel asked with a grin, eyes glowing.

“I said nothing,” Vlad replied with false innocence.

“Yeah, you were saying it pretty loudly too,” Daniel said, turning to begin preparing the omelets. Vlad took a seat at the island in the middle of the kitchen to watch. With time and practice, Daniel was going to become quite the talented cook. “So, I already told you how I’m destined to become the greatest evil the world has ever known or whatever. Dan coming back in time to ensure his own existence isn’t exactly an original idea at this point. What I want to know is how you got involved in this mess.”

“Do you really want to know the sordid details of my relationship with your future self?” Vlad asked, trying to play off of Daniel’s inevitable teenage discomfort to stave off his own. The conversation was going to be embarrassing for both of them.

“I want to know those details less than you could possibly imagine,” Daniel declared, and then pantomimed gagging for good measure. “But I need to know as much as I can about him, in case he comes back. Or another future version of me tries the same thing. I want to be prepared, and this is the only way I can think of to do it. Just, keep it PG and keep the sappy stuff to yourself.”

Those were terms that Vlad could live with. The painkillers were beginning to take effect, and the smell of melting butter in the pan was more invigorating than nauseating. Coffee would certainly help speed up his recovery. Vlad pondered briefly if Daniel drank coffee and decided to make a full pot just in case. As he began rummaging through the cabinets for the coffee filters, Vlad explained how he came to meet Dan, “It began late last summer, at the opening of the Amity Arts Council’s gallery which I had made the mistake of funding…”


	6. A Soft Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which everything begins to make sense, and Danny and Vlad are finally together in the way they deserve

_Before Everything_

“So what’s the job this time? Stolen artifact? Bodyguard duty? Assassination?” Dan asked as he floated around Clockwork’s citadel, waiting for the other ghost to deign to speak to him. Typical Clockwork. He would summon Dan, tell him it was a high priority job, and then make Dan wait for thirty minutes before explaining himself. It was worse than going to a doctor’s appointment.

“Something a little more personal,” Clockwork replied vaguely as he flipped through the images on his portal. Dan shrugged, not that the other ghost was paying attention, and went back to prodding Dark-Dan’s thermos. Someday, Dan was going to ask Clockwork to let that maniac out so he could give him the thrashing he deserved.

“I suppose he’s as good a place to start as any,” Clockwork said, startling Dan out of his pleasantly violent daydreams. “Many years ago, Dark-Dan made a misguided attempt to ensure his own existence by traveling through time to murder your friends and family.”

“I know, I was there,” Dan retorted, “And then he tried it again a few years later with Vlad.”

Clockwork stared at Dan for a few moments. Apparently, he found whatever he was looking for, because he continued, “Not exactly. That Dan was from a different timeline. Perhaps I’m going about this the wrong way. You love your husband, yes? Is there anything you wouldn’t do for Vlad?”

“Nothing.”

Clockwork nodded as though he expected this answer. “If circumstances beyond your control demanded it, could you give him up?”

“Give him up!” Dan snarled, “Of all the stupid-…never. It’d be easier to separate my heart from my chest than to let Vlad go.”

“You’d choose him even over the alternatives?” Clockwork pulled his staff from behind his back, images flickering to life on its clockface. Danny and Sam, swinging a dark-haired child between them. Danny and Valerie, having Christmas with her dad. Danny and Tucker, tangled on a couch laughing in the dim TV light. Danny and Paulina, holding twins at a christening. Danny and Dash, lip-locked in a stadium ignoring the flashes of the paparazzi’s cameras.

“Enough,” Dan barked, jerking away from all the scenarios Clockwork was trying to tempt him with. “What are you after? Why is it so important to you that I dump Vlad?”

“I am only here to ensure your happiness. You have arrived at a crossroad, a place of divergent paths. In order to keep Vlad, you must make a choice.”

“My choice has been made for centuries,” Dan declared as firmly as he could. “Ever since Dark Dan Number Two showed up and tried to destroy my life in a completely new way.”

“Is that what he did?” Clockwork asked with the largest smile Dan had ever seen on his shifting face. It was more than a little disconcerting.

The obvious answer was yes, which meant it wasn’t the answer Clockwork was looking for. Dan wracked his brain, dredging up the details of an event he had not thought of in centuries. Other than thoroughly humiliating Vlad and sending Danny on a wild goose chase, Dark Dan Number Two had not really accomplished anything. Sure, he had claimed otherwise, but Dan had never been able to figure out just what his evil future-self had done to get his so called “quality of life improvement.”

After the whole ordeal was over, Danny and Vlad had been closer than ever. Shared trauma turned into shared bonding which turned into a highly embarrassing crush on the older halfa. Dan remembered the shame and confusion he felt at the time, and how he blamed Dark Dan Number Two for his feelings. Would his obsession with Vlad have taken the turn it did without Dark Dan’s intervention?

It worked out in the end, of course. He and Vlad had been happily married for several lifetimes. All the people Clockwork had tried to tempt him with were mortal; their relationships would have been a brief spark in Dan’s indeterminately long lifespan.

“Oh,” Dan wheezed, turning to stare wide-eyed at Clockwork. That was the point. That was Dark Dan’s quality of life improvement. Without that push, the events that eventually lead to Danny working up the drunken courage to kiss Vlad on his twenty-third birthday might never have happened.

“You finally understand,” Clockwork said with a satisfied nod. “Will you do it? It’s the only way. You and he are more…stubborn than most.”

“I wouldn’t even know how to-”

“Of course you do. Stop thinking of it from an outside perspective. He was not some stranger from and alternate dimension wearing your face. You _are_ him.”

“I am him,” Dan repeated incredulously. “I can do it, because I’ve already done it.”

“That does not mean it will be easy,” Clockwork warned. “Your powers are sufficient to carry you through the physical trials involved in this undertaking, but the mental strain is different. What you’ll be doing to Vlad will break him.”

“I have to break him before I can start putting him back together.”

* * *

_After_

Popping the cap off the thermos was as easy for Dan as flexing his shoulders.

“That was unnecessary,” Clockwork said, deadpan as ever, as he floated over to place the now-broken Fenton Thermos on one of his many shelves.

“Which part? Breaking the thermos, or breaking them?” Dan asked with mild interest as he stretched. Being confined in the thermos was as unpleasantly restrictive as he remembered. Any amount of time spent inside that contraption was too long.

“The thermos. The necessity of your actions in regards to your past-self remains to be seen,” Clockwork said. Dan had known him long enough, or would eventually know him long enough, to know that he was using his disapproving voice. Dan scowled.

“This was your idea to begin with. Don’t get tetchy with me for getting results,” Dan retorted. Clockwork’s intervention began and ended with facilitating the venture; Dan had to hash out the details on his own, working half blind from several centuries away. It had taken a lot of time and effort to piece his patchy childhood memories into a coherent plan.

Clockwork floated calmly over to the viewing portal. “Did you get the results you wanted?” he asked, flipping idly through time and space presumably to find the right world to send Dan back to.

“You tell me.”

Clockwork almost smiled. “I’m more interested in the strength of your convictions. I gave you the opportunity. Your actions and convictions were the catalyst for change, or the lack of change. So, tell me: did you succeed?”

Dan’s immediate response was yes, of course he succeeded. Failure had been unheard of for centuries. Clockwork was still staring at him, staring through him, which made Dan pause.

Had it worked? He would not have absolute certainty until he returned home. Dan had done everything he could think of, used every non-lethal method at his disposal. Vlad and Danny had risen to the bait better than he could have hoped. Dan played them both masterfully, used their tendency towards obsessive behavior to his advantage. The shame and anguish between them was thick enough to carve with a knife once he was finished.

It was exactly how he remembered, just from a different perspective. That was the answer.

“Yes,” Dan declared proudly, “It worked.”

It had to have worked. Dan wasn’t sure what he would do if he had failed.

“Then it’s time for you to return home, and reap what your hard work has sown,” Clockwork declared, pausing the portal on the same day that Dan had left to begin his mission.

Dan paused, half of a leg already in the portal. As eager as he was to return home, there was still one unanswered question on his mind. “Why did you do this for me?” he asked. “For us?”

“You’re infinitely more likeable when you’re not trying to set the world ablaze,” Clockwork explained. The slight raise to one of his eyebrows told Dan that he was only mostly joking. Shaking his head to hide his fond smile, Dan gripped the rim of the portal and swung through back to his own timeline.

* * *

_And After That_

“Daniel? Daniel?” a voice was calling, but Dan was too tired to answer. The moment he stepped back into his own timeline, a wave of exhaustion slammed him into the couch.

“There you are,” the voice continued warmly. A hand brushed Dan’s long hair away from his face before sliding down his cheek. “You shaved.”

“Hmmmm,” Dan groaned as he stretched, nuzzling into the warm palm on his cheek. “Had to, did a thing for Clockwork.”

The hand moved back to his hair and was joined by another to card through his undoubtedly messy hair. “How long were you gone?”

“Nearly a year this time,” Dan said, finally opening his eyes to stare up at his husband. Vlad stared back, brow furrowed with concern.

“That’s the longest you’ve ever been gone,” Vlad said slowly, “Are we certain there are no potential side effects?”

Many arguments had been fought over Dan completing time travel favors for Clockwork. Vlad didn’t think it was healthy to be plugged in and out of the timestream, even the few times that Dan had done it. Dan, on the other hand, trusted Clockwork to look out for his best interests. After his last trip, he was more certain than ever that Clockwork was truly invested in his wellbeing.

That being said, Dan had never returned from a trip and felt like he was being crushed to death by exhaustion, either.

“I’m fine,” Dan promised, “But I don’t think I’ll be taking any long assignments like that again.”

Dan sat upright just enough for Vlad to slide onto the couch and put Dan’s head in his lap. His right hand continued to play with Dan’s hair while Dan grabbed his left. Absently turning his husband’s wedding band, Dan reflected on his recent trip through time.

It had been a harrowing experience, going through the ordeal as a child. Younger Danny had been absolutely terrified of seeing his older self again. Seeing it from the ‘villain’ perspective hadn’t been any less trying, especially remembering the nightmares he used to have about it.

Tricking and seducing Vlad had been easy, Dan had centuries of experience doing just that. Vlad was the blood in his veins, the beat of his heart, the rush of his powers. There would never be another who could know him so intimately, or whom he could know in return. Breaking his heart had been the hard part, even knowing that he would also eventually be the one to mend it.

“You’re being uncharacteristically quiet,” Vlad murmured, lacing his fingers through Dan’s to still his movement. “Normally after one of Clockwork’s favors, you can’t wait to tell me everything.”

Dan hummed and brushed a kiss across Vlad’s knuckles. “Maybe later. This was a different kind of mission.”

“How so?”

How to explain without giving everything away? Hurting Vlad, his Vlad in the present time, was unthinkable. It made his stomach churn. Sure, they still fought and argued, but never with the intent to tear each other apart like they used to. Dan would carve out his own heart before he intentionally hurt Vlad.

“It was just one of those terrible things that people do for love.”

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [A Turn of the Hourglass - Illustration](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28287096) by [gally_hin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gally_hin/pseuds/gally_hin)




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